I Born Happy
By Phil Scovell
Table Of Contents
A Shell Of A Mess
The Design Of Prayer
#1 Trigger Points.
#4 Focusing On Present Emotions.
#6 Illumination and Expansion.
#7 Spiritual Warfare.
#8 God's Voice.
#9 God's Word of Truth.
#10 The Holy Spirit.
This is a typical experience I have in prayer on a regular
bases. I have taken the time to break down various elements to
explain how the prayer works, why, and who might be involved in
the process. So, you are about to read two articles in one.
The story is true, at least the story part about the turtle
I talk about. You may choose to disbelieve the rest of my
personal testimony as fictitious, felonious, right down spooky,
or something I just made up because I don't have anything else to
do. On the other hand, for those who need it the most, I trust
it brings a level of spiritual intimacy into your life you have
never experienced. If you need help, on the other hand, let me
A Shell Of A Mess
By Phil Scovell
"Dad?" I think we are going to have to wake mom," my
I was seated behind my desk typing in response to an email.
"What for I asked; looking at my watch. "It's 1 o'clock in the
morning. She just went to bed 45 minutes ago. What's wrong?"
"Something is wrong with one of her turtles," she replied.
"Her turtles?" I said with disbelief. "What's wrong with
"Well," Gretchen began, "I check the turtles every morning,
or just about every morning, when I get up and walk through the
utility room." They both looked ok this morning when I saw them
but Mike said he saw one on it's back tonight."
"On his back?" I repeated.
"Yeh. I said that didn't sound right because I have never
seen either of the turtles on their back. So I just now went and
checked and they are not on their backs."
"Are they ok, then?" I wanted to know. Why did you say we
should get your mom up?"
"Well, the one that was on his back earlier today has his
head stuck inside his shell."
"What?" I said with amazement. "How could that be?"
"I don't know," Gretchen said, "but it is. I supposed he
was on his back earlier, trying to find a position that would
free his head or something, " my daughter said. "It appears his
head is somehow caught on the skin around his head and neck."
"I wonder why that would be?" I said; picturing the turtle
in my thoughts.
"It appears," she said, "that the skin around his head and
neck are very dry or something. I don't know if that has
anything to do with it or not."
"Man," I sighed. "I don't know what we could do to help
Gretchen said, "Mike and I are using a Q-tip with a small
amount of Vaseline on it to press gently around his head and what
little of his neck is visible. Hopefully that will be enough to
give him lubrication to pop his head out."
When she went back downstairs to attend to the turtle in
distress, I started to pray for the turtle.
A few moments later, she came running back upstairs and
said, "Dad! It worked. He popped his head free and is moving
"I said, "He's probably hungry, if he hasn't eaten all day,
so go get some meal worms and go down and put some in front of
him to see how much he can move around and to see if he eats
any." Meal worms are about a turtle's favorite food. You can
almost teach a turtle how to do back flips if you offer them meal
worms for a snack. By the way, turtles, although normally slow,
can move faster than you can possibly imagine when you toss a
grasshopper or some crickets or meal worms into their aquarium.
She came back upstairs later and said that the turtle
gobbled them down as fast as she could dump them into the
aquarium in front of him. "He really went after them, too, so he
must be ok if he can move that quickly," she concluded.
"Well, it would appear," I said, "he is going to be ok,
then, I guess," and so he was.
We determined later that the flooring we had switched to in
the bottom of the aquarium was making it more difficult for the
turtles to crawl to their swimming pool, if you want to call it
that, and it seems likely that only one of the two turtles could
make it into the water. This is likely the cause for the second
turtle to loose internal lubrication and somehow got his head and
neck stuck inside his own shell. We have since fixed the
flooring to make it very easy for them to climb into their pool
If you are not an animal lover, this story will have little,
if any, meaning to you. I mean, after all, it was just a stupid
turtle. Who cares about turtles. My wife does. I sort of enjoy
them, too, and had a big Arkansas pet turtle that I caught while
on a vacation when I was a kid. Furthermore, my wife was born
and raised on an Iowa farm. Animals are a way of life for her.
So, the old axiom must be true; "You can take the girl out of the
farm but you can't take the farm out of the girl." Thus it is,
we have a zoo at our home and always have.
(#1 This current event had a strange effect upon me. For
the first time in my life, I felt sad for a turtle; at least
that's what it felt like. I knew my wife would be saddened that
one of her turtles died during the night, too. I thought of the
little turtle on his back as he tried finding a position where he
was able to free himself. I realized, of course, he was just a
cold blooded reptile and if he died, it shouldn't have any
discernable effect upon me, but something had touched me deeply.
When I prayed for him, I thought, I was mostly praying for one of
my wife's pets because of her love for her animals. Yet, deep
down inside, something else was going on inside of me and I
didn't know what it was #1).
(#2 As the days passed, the thought of the trapped turtle
in his own shell continually returned to my thoughts. I just
considered the thought of his plight a loose connection to my own
experiences and with others with whom I pray who often express
being trapped in some way. Something, on the other hand,
bothered me deeply and something I couldn't see spiritually on
the surface. I let it go for several days until I couldn't take
it any longer #2).
(#3 Walking into my office, I sat down in a recliner in a
corner and began to pray. I focused on the turtle, the words
spoken that night, and my personal feelings that surfaced. I
examined my feelings relating to how my wife would feel when she
found out something had happened to one of her turtles. Nothing
unusual was there but normal concern for her feelings of loss if
the turtle died. I finally turned to my own feelings but I could
not, at first, locate anything that seemed applicable to the
(#4 "Lord?" I finally said in my thoughts, "I don't see or
"Focus more on your thoughts," I felt the Holy Spirit say.
"How did you feel?"
"Trapped?" I suggested. "I can't think of any time,
specifically, in my life, when I felt trapped and unable to free
myself," I said in my thoughts as I prayed.
There was one memory that did pop into my mind. I had dug a
hole with a post hole digger of my dad's and had failed to refill
the hole when I was finished playing around. When it snowed that
winter, it filled the hole. Upon walking across our backyard one
day that winter, I fell, with one leg, into the hole I had dug
and couldn't extricate myself for a couple of minutes. I
eventually did so, however, and was able to walk the remaining
few feet to the house without incident. I prayed in and around
this memory and although there most certainly was fear involved
in the memory at the time of the event, nothing was there now
because there was no fear any longer nor had any lie of the Enemy
been implanted in my thinking at the time of the event.
"Lord?" I said, "I'm looking but this memory doesn't seem
like the right place." I continued looking.
Memories flashed by rapidly but none of them had any
feelings, negative feelings, that popped to the surface and
caught my attention. I was becoming frustrated because I knew
something had to be there but I could not find it. I could feel
it, on the other hand, so I continued looking as I prayed#4).
(#5 Finally, I said again, "Lord? If you don't show me, I
won't find it. I don't recall anything ever in my life where I
felt trapped like that turtle caught inside his shell and unable
to free himself. Where is it?" #5)
(#6 "Womb," I heard clearly in my thoughts.
I was suddenly at my birth. I have never gone that far back
in my own memories. Oh, sure. I have prayed with dozens who
have gone this far back in their prayer sessions but I never
expected it to happen to me. There I was, however, being born.
More specifically, I had not been born quite yet. I was upside
down, and about ready to be born but as I looked, everything look
like I was all tangled up in my mother's womb. I felt the
concern and fear I had at the time #6).
(#7 I saw a form of Jesus standing in the birthing room but
I also saw a dark figure standing closer to where my mother was.
I knew, without asking, there was a demonic presence attempting
to cause problems relating to my birth but I didn't realize, at
first, what that might be. "Die," and "kill," were two words
that were clearly felt. I explicitly recognized, for some
reason, an attempt on my birth was being perpetrated. Due to the
definite feeling of emotional and physical distress, I
immediately prayed concerning this intrusion, and against any and
all lies or words or feelings or thoughts, that were uttered in
my presence by any lying spirits #7).
(#8 Once the demon was commanded to remain at attention and
forbidden to exercise communication in any way, I asked the Lord
what truth He wanted me to know. I nearly laughed to myself when
the response came.
At first, I felt that was a strange way for Jesus to be
talking, but when I recognized he was pleased, as he stood on the
other side of the room watching, I realized the two words, "I
born, Sounded like baby talk; my baby talk. They were, in fact,
the words in my thoughts as I was being born. Additionally, as I
heard "I born" in my thoughts as I watched, I felt I heard Jesus
saying at the very same time, "You are born." #8).
(#9 As I meditated on what had occurred in my short time of
prayer, I felt something was accomplished by the Lord in my
behalf which somehow was tapped into by my wife's pet turtle when
he was trapped within his shell. The two words, "I born," were
my words of accomplishment, as in, "I made it," at least that was
the feeling I had during my prayer time. This is often the way
the Lord speaks to me, that is, by short statements, or mostly,
by spiritual awareness, of which I put my own words to what I
feel in order to explain to others what happened #9).
I am not suggesting you have to believe anything about what
I have just described. You can call it any numbers of things.
You can even believe I made the whole thing up so that is not the
purpose of this testimony. However, where you are in your
relationship with the Lord is my concern and more importantly, it
is His concern. The turtle reminded me of so many with whom I
have prayed, some still trapped, yet Jesus is available at every
point in our lives to set us free.
(#10 The turtle, apparently, just needed the refreshment of
the water for lubrication. The Bible clearly uses water to
depict the ministry and nature of the Holy Spirit and the current
event, plus my birth, where water is also involved, began to make
spiritual sense to me.
Are you stuck in your shell? Maybe you are hiding so you
can't be hurt or attacked and so you think that you will always
be protected. I understand those feelings. So does Jesus, for
that matter, but he has a way out for you. The ministry of the
Holy Spirit is likewise available for every situation you face or
have experienced. Let Him be your shell and set you free.
38 "He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of
his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
39 But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on
him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because
that Jesus was not yet glorified," (John 7:38-39).
Note. The Greek word for "belly" in this passage which Jesus
used literally means, (the womb in which life is conceived). He
is referring to the human spirit that is born anew at the moment
of salvation. Compare the complete chapter of John 3 to this
concept and you will understand more #10).
I Born Happy
By Phil Scovell
This is a basic analysis of a renewing of the mind event I
experienced. If you haven't read the testimony upon which the
healing is based, please do so before reading this article. It
is called, "A Shell Of A Mess."
The Design Of Prayer
#1 Trigger Points.
The term "trigger) is widely used by therapists and
counselors alike to indicate a point of reaction. It is where an
emotional feeling occurs, which generally is a negative emotional
response to a current event, that is, something which has
recently occurred, normally on the fly, in every day life. We
often refer to "trigger points" when we say something as, "Boy,
he really pushed my buttons today." In my case, it was a pet
turtle, whose head was stuck in his shell, that triggered a deep
emotional response of helplessness, or more specifically, a
feeling of being trapped (I'm not going to make it) sort of
feeling. No, this time, it wasn't going to overwhelm me as such
might have been the case many years ago. Do to a lack of
knowledge of PTSD, Posttraumatic Stress Disorder), and its
characteristics and consequences, just such an event often would
trigger in me, mild to strong anxiety, and to the extreme,
fullblown panic attacks, and at time, nightmares and the hearing
The word "trigger" is just a simple way therapists and
counselors refer to whatever has provoked a negative emotional
response. I might note here, it does not always have to be a
negative feeling of which we suddenly become aware, but it
If you stop even momentarily at the second you are being
triggered, you will recognize the emotional feeling you
experience penetrates much deeper than at first realized. Quite
simply, you will detect something feels wrong emotionally. The
true origin of the problem is often, although not always, deep
but the emotional response is on the surface. Thus it is we
react so quickly, or in other words, we are triggered on the fly
as the present event unfolds. It can be something that has been
repetitive throughout your entire life, such as a sudden reaction
which invokes anger. It can be something that hurts or even
makes you feel guilty or embarrassed, or any other numbers of
emotional responses such as shame, confusion, fear, grief, shame,
rejection, resentment, helplessness or powerlessness, or any
combination of negative feelings about yourself. It can be
something as accidental as someone cutting you off in traffic.
You yell, honk the horn, and do everything but cuss, or maybe you
do that, too, because it triggered something and that something
was anger and anger covers the pain you truly feel. Regardless,
any given spoken word, a thought, a feeling, a song you hear on
the radio, even a scent you smell, can trigger the surface
feelings. This surface awareness, or even surface response, is
not the real problem; it is only the point of awareness that
something is wrong. Hence, a trigger.
There are signs that what you are feeling, or seeing in your
mind, or whatever is struggling up and into your emotions, are
signals attempting to gain your attention. If you have no
disorders, syndromes, or psychoses, these negative emotions flash
off and on in your mind, in your memory repository, or so it may
seem, and won't generally bother you at the conscious level, but
may appear only as a mental awareness or an annoyance. If, on
the other hand, you have any emotional type disorder, even if you
feel depressed or perhaps discouraged, the negative emotion will
do more than flash off and on, they will be harshly felt and
normally painfully. You may not even remember the original
event, especially if it was traumatic, because your mind may have
attempted to repress or suppress the original source of pain.
You haven't forgotten, at least your emotions haven't, but the
older we get, the more difficult, even impossible, it becomes to
push down and cover up by personal activity or psychologically
learned behavior functionality. Statements such as, "I'll never
forget when," or "I'll never let him say that again to me," or
I'll never forget how much that hurt," or, "I'll never let him do
that to me again," are all indicators of something much deeper
and has just been triggered, generally speaking, by something
just said or done, or even just by a thought, and we felt the
woundedness left behind in our emotions.
A vivid example of this, and that I often hear from those
with whom I pray, is the sound of vomiting which triggers
sickness in their own body almost immediately. Later, we often
discoverer they grew up with alcoholic parents and this retching
sound was commonly heard in their family life. This spiritual
phenomena of repression or suppression, once we have learned how
the mind is renew by the Holy Spirit, immediately allows access
to these deep, superficially forgotten, painful memories through
Go back and read the section marked with 3 which I have
labeled "Prayer." You will see, simply by reading that brief
section, that I am restricting my meaning of prayer to something
very basic and very simple. Anyone can do it, if they are born
again, and you need not be a theologian, Bible scholar, or you
don't even have to be a veteran 20 year Sunday School pin
representative of unmissed Sunday school classes (perfect
attendance) to be able to exercise this form of prayer.
I always describe this type of prayer by defining it as
"exchanging our thoughts for God's." It is not meditation, self
hypnosis, visualization, mental imagery, or theatrical regressive
meditation. It is simply talking with God by thinking. Continue
into the next section for a better understanding of its
#4 Focusing On Present Emotions.
The way we get to the original source, the initial problem
area, is by examination of our feelings. How we feel now is a
thread which ties back to where it all began. All we do,
therefore, is follow the string of feelings back until the Holy
Spirit shows us the first, or original, place where the feeling
germinated. This is normally a journey back through memory
events that come to mind as we pray and contains woundedness.
Eventually, and on God's time, we arrive at that original
source of pain. No, we generally won't like it there but Jesus
knows this and He is always with you and, yes, even in the memory
no matter how far back you might have to go. This time, and in
this specific situation, the Holy Spirit led me back to an event
at my birth. It was there, at that exact moment in time, where
He wanted to bring healing.
Just about this time, people say, "Wait a minute. I thought
it was all completed at the cross so why not cut just the head
off and forget all this other stuff. Try doing that with
dandelions and see what happens. I'll speak about this felonious
theological concept later.
In every case of current negative emotional response,
feeling of woundedness, or mental anguish, there is going to be a
corresponding origin. It may be something that happened
yesterday, last week, a month ago, last year, or a backward
distance than you can possibly imagine. In this case, I went,
believe it or not, back to my birth because that is where I had
to go to see the lie and hear the truth.
"Wasn't that settled at the cross?"
Yes but not fixed, repaired, and healed. Jesus made the down
payment; the Holy Spirit healed the woundedness that remained in
my unregenerate emotions and mind.
#6 Illumination and Expansion.
This is simply the time we see what Jesus sees, or wants us
to see, concerning the origin of the fear, guilt, shame,
condemnation, hopelessness, or anything that is out of spiritual
or Scriptural syncopation. For example, reoccurring guilt,
perpetual shame, ceaseless rejection, or endless fear and
As Born Again Christians, we should know, and fully
understand the true application and functionality of 1 John 1:9
but often we find ourselves confessing and confessing and
confessing and asking for God's forgiveness. We know,
Biblically, He forgave us the first time but why, then, the
returning guilt that relentlessly returns to torture us? The why
is the where, that is, where Jesus wants us to see what He sees
and in the way He sees it. In short, we are looking for a lie
that corresponds with the feeling we have.
At this point, perhaps I should comment more on going back
to one's birth. Yes, it is true that many cults have similar
practices supposedly achieved through meditation, hypnoses, life
regression, astral projection, and even lucid dreaming; just to
name a few. They often go beyond birth, they believe, into other
dimensions, parallel universes, ultra states of mental awareness,
and even, supposedly, previous lives. We, as Born Again
Christian, know reincarnation is felonious theology so, if one
attempts, or even tries going back further than one's birth, they
would be violating Scriptural doctrine and principle.
It is now well known, medically and scientifically
documented, that babies are much more aware in the womb than we
previously knew. The mind and brain begin to develop rapidly
during the third trimester. Although few people ever seem to
recall thoughts from within the womb, I have prayed with some who
have experienced it and as you have read, I have as well. This
is one reason why I always ask a person, with whom I am praying,
if they were born prematurely. Premies, especial those two and
three months before normal nine months of gestation, develop
mentally and emotionally outside the womb. They are, in other
words, exposed to anything and everything in their premature
state of development.
One of my earliest memories was when, according to my own
mother, I couldn't have been over 2 or 3 months old. When I
described in detail what had happen, my mother said we had no
pictures of that part of the house at that point of my life and
there was literally no way, unless I did remember, that such a
memory was possible.
Another memory I had, I was even smaller but after
discussing it with my mother, there was no way to confirm nor
deny the experience due to where I was at the time. The memory
event had to have been when I was, again, under 2 or 3 months of
age but I was definitely an infant.
"So what does this have to do with anything?" you may ask.
It means, if Jesus can, and does, access our thoughts at
those early stages, whose to say the Enemy can't as well. What
can we do about it? It is called prayer and taking every thought
#7 Spiritual Warfare.
Regardless of what you think, or have heard, or been taught,
spiritual warfare isn't something that takes much effort. Yes, I
know. I've heard all the stories, dramatic as they may be, and I
also realize that some parts of the world have more open and
direct demonic manifestative demonstrations, but the spiritual
warfare aspect of this area of inner healing has already been
accomplished by the Lord in our behalf. If you want to spend
hours casting out demons, so designated, wrestling around with
the Enemy in various ways, including fasting for several days or
weeks, then holding people down, screaming into their face as
they spit on you, demanding obedience from the demon inside of
them, and invoking specialize devised prayers until the sun comes
up, be my guest. I prefer not to screw around that long over
something that is already done. If you are unaware of who you
are in Christ, spiritual warfare is laborious, time consuming,
emotionally and physically draining, and a very complicated
complex process. The Enemy makes it that way if we allow it.
As you have read, and as I prayed, literally thought about
what God was saying and showing me, I saw Jesus, which I don't
often see in this manner, a lying spirit materialized within the
memory picture. This was simply Jesus revealing His presence and
that my distress, in this case, had a demonic element of
involvement. I spent no time attempting to address the lying
spirit present at my birth but simply, knowing he was trying to
create fear and worry and panic, prayed around his presence and
interference. Why? I already knew, the lying spirit had no
right to be there in the first place. You see, only Jesus has
the power of life and death. Satan can't take anybody's life as
Jesus once again proved to me in this personal prayer experience.
Why did I know the lying spirit was there? In my case, I saw the
darken figure of something about 4 feet tall. I heard his
thoughts, or words, "Kill, die." I didn't need visual
confirmation to know that he was there but the Lord allowed its
presence to be clearly seen so I would understand the context of
the memory event. Furthermore, wherever there is a lie, there is
a lying spirit.
#8 God's Voice.
Hearing the voice of the Lord doesn't mean audible, that is,
with your ears. It can mean that, of course, but that would be
for a different reason and purpose. What we need to learn is to
determine whose speaking; the Lord or the Enemy. A simple
approach to this is knowing the truth from a lie. Jesus never
lies. If you are not able to recognize the difference, don't
feel bad. I was 50 years old, and had been a Christian, at that
point, for 45 years, before I began to learn the difference
between the voice of the Lord and that of the Enemy. As we are
healed in various wounded areas of our lives, His voice becomes
very easy to recognize while in a state of open prayer without
stopping what we are doing, such as first going into a 30 day
fast, allowing someone to wash our feet, pulling the car over to
the side of the road to climb out only to fall on our knees, or
face, to pray about our guilt and sinfulness just in case Jesus
has overlooked our spiritual wretchedness, taking communion 10 or
12 times before approaching our feelings, or maybe reading the
Bible from front to back before asking Jesus what in the Sam Hill
is going on. No, I am not making fun of any of these things but
if you prefer living legalistically or by spiritual performance
or just like to know you are keeping spiritually busy, fine. I
used to live exactly the same way. I am more than just
suggesting it isn't necessary. Actually, I have probably burns
more spiritual energy needlessly than you, or anybody else, has
No, in case you were wondering, and in this testimony, I
wasn't looking for Jesus or demons; I was following my
woundedness back to wherever it took me and that's all. I was,
on the other hand, listening for His voice at the right time,
which is based upon His timing and not mine, and I heard what He
#9 God's Word of Truth.
Raised as I was, none of what I have talked about thus far
is acceptable. Yes, we could have a, so called, personal
relationship with Christ through salvation but salvation had
nothing to do with the rest of our life. Sure, it allowed our
sins to be forgiven eternally and it positively made a
reservation for us in Heaven when we died or when Jesus returned.
It also made us spiritually righteous in God's eyes. Of course,
how we felt, and saw ourselves, was a different ball game all
The Word I was taught to believe, was only the written Word
of God. This is where we get all we know and believe. No
feelings allowed, please. You could feel happy about being Born
Again, but everything was not only done at the cross, but if you
didn't read it in the written Word, it wasn't true. This
felonious theology has probably created more spiritual
woundedness than anything ever taught. Of course, I am not
suggesting for a second that the Bible isn't, in fact, the Word
of God. If you are any type of a Bible student of the Word at
all, of course, you know Jesus is called, "The Word of God," as
well. So, that creates a problem, does it not?
At this point, let me ask a question to clarify where I am
going with my concept. Does the Bible tell us everything? Wait!
Think before you answer. Does the Bible tell us, for example,
when the Lord is going to return, at least as far as we know
relating to date and time? We know the Bible says He made the
stars but the Bible doesn't say scientifically how it occurred or
how many stars there are in the universe nor does it tell us the
size of the universe. The son averages 93,000,000 miles from
earth but you won't find that fact in the Bible. You can rend
your clothes, cast dirt in the air, spit, and walk naked and
barefoot for three years as Isaiah did when commanded by the
Lord, (boy you better know God's voice for sure before you go
doing that around here these days), but you can't prove if life
exists only on earth or elsewhere on other planets throughout the
billions of galaxies in the universe. The Bible is silent on
these, and many other, theological and scientific questions that
I plan on asking Jesus about the second I walk into Heaven's
door. I hope the Lord is ready for all the volumes of questions
I have for Him when I arrive.
I trust you get my point. If you are trying to decide about
changing jobs, buying a new car, switching churches, going to
Africa as a missionary, which Bible seminary to attend, or if you
should dare stop at Dairy Queen on the way home from Sunday night
church, and you can't find the answer in the Bible, how are you
going to find out what Jesus knows or wants as His will for your
Think of Isaac Newton, called the father of physics, for
example. Did he know all he determined about physics and the
universe from the Bible? He wasn't even a Christian at that
time. He got his wisdom and knowledge from the Lord, sure
enough, but he didn't find it in the Bible word for word. Are
you following me here or should I spell it out?
Here is the bottom line. I judge all I hear in the Holy
Spirit based upon what I know from God's Word. I trust you do as
well. If we don't, we will end up in spiritual trouble and be
easily deceived; it is just that simple. So, learn the Word, be
discipled, and know Him through His Word.
#10 The Holy Spirit.
Speaking of the Holy Spirit, just how much do you know about
Back in the late 1970s, I was an assistant pastor in a small
church in a small town in western Colorado. I had been, up until
that time, traveling and preaching as a guest speaker in churches
around the country. I started doing that at 23 years of age.
One day, a pastor friend called about a hundred miles away
and asked if I would come over and speak for five services on the
book of Revelation. I said I would and sat down and put together
five sermons whereby I would be teaching an overview of the
entire book of Revelation.
Sometime later, I was home thinking about spiritual things
and thought I would write down some notes, putting them into
sermons, about the Holy Spirit. Then I would let other pastors
know I had these five sermons on the Holy Spirit available and I
figured I could obtain other speaking engagements then. Boy, was
I wrong. First of all, I couldn't even write down a single page
of information I knew about the Holy Spirit. Oh, sure,
theologically, and doctrinally, I could have written a book but I
am talking about from personal experience. You see, I had none.
I put my notes away and tried not to think about it. I was later
filled with the Holy Spirit many years thereafter, in August of
1982 as I prayed alone in the basement of my home.
In late 1985, I was sitting in church, half listening to the
sermon my pastor was preaching, he didn't personally know any
more about the Holy Spirit than I did, and all of the sudden, a
flood of information began pouring into my mind. I wrote down as
much as I could all during the services and when I got home, I
spent all Sunday afternoon writing down everything that was
coming to mind. I have probably, to date, and from personal
experience, written more on the Holy Spirit, than any other
personal favorite topic.
Did you overlook, or forget, that it is the Holy Spirit who
was sent to dwell within us and to fulfill the earthly ministry
of Jesus after His ascension? I thought so because I often
forget that fact even now. Maybe it's like the dried out turtle
whose head got stuck in its shell. A little water goes a long
ways when it comes to hearing the Holy Spirit who dwells within
You don't need to move your lips when you pray because your
very life is a perpetual prayer to God. If, that is, you are
Born Again. If not, well, let me know and we'll get that taken
care of right away.
Next, start with a feeling by thinking/praying about it.
This will be, generally, a negative feeling and it might be down
right emotionally painful and psychologically uncomfortable.
When it feels like something is wrong, there is generally
Take that feeling and think/focus on it. Let the feelings,
the real feelings, associated with the woundedness you feel,
surface in your thoughts and emotions.
Ask the Lord from where these feelings and thoughts are
coming. Then look for a memory, that is, feel for a memory, by
letting the negative emotion point you in the right direction.
You generally end up in a memory some place in your life.
Examine the memory for what feels wrong, Ask the Holy Spirit to
show you what Jesus sees. If you find nothing, ask the Lord to
take you to another memory where these same feelings exist.
Eventually, a memory will surface which is almost always the
memory that has an imbedded lie, thus, the presence of the pain
in the first place is found. Whenever you arrive at a memory
event, ask the Lord to show you the lie embedded within that
memory event. If there is one, you'll know it for a fact when
you see it.
When you recognize the lie for what it is worth, ask the
Lord to show you His truth. In my case, based upon this true
story, I was having difficulty at birth and that fear allowed a
lying spirit to try and make me think I would die. I don't care
if you believe this part or not but it is exactly what the Lord
revealed to me as I prayed. I wasn't hypnotized, meditating,
using guided imagery, nor had I smoked any pot or hash that day.
In fact, I haven't smoked anything since I was 16 years old and,
yes, I did inhale.
When you hear the truth, you'll know it. You then will be
free, totally free, and if ever returning to this memory again,
there won't ever be any more woundedness. This does not mean the
memory has been altered; it just means it has been healed and the
lie cannot cause you any more pain. If that memory still hurts
when it returns or you focus on it, there is more to be revealed
within that event and possibly at a later time.
Finally, this is all I do, pray with people, that is, so if
you need help, let me know. It is common, at first, to hit blank
walls and this is when two, praying in agreement, are able to do
things we cannot accomplish on our own, (See Matthew 18:18-19).
So don't let it discourage you from continuing and if you need
help, let me know.
End Of Document
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