I Born Happy

                               By Phil Scovell

                              Table Of Contents


          A Shell Of A Mess

          The Design Of Prayer

               #1  Trigger Points.
               #2  Awareness.
               #3  Prayer.
               #4  Focusing On Present Emotions.
               #5  Origin.
               #6  Illumination and Expansion.
               #7  Spiritual Warfare.
               #8  God's Voice.
               #9  God's Word of Truth.
               #10  The Holy Spirit.

          Basics Reviewed.


               This is a typical experience  I have in prayer on a  regular
          bases.  I have  taken the time to break down  various elements to
          explain how the prayer  works, why, and who might  be involved in
          the process.  So, you are about to read two articles in one.

               The story is true, at least the  story part about the turtle
          I  talk about.   You  may  choose to  disbelieve the  rest  of my
          personal  testimony as fictitious,  felonious, right down spooky,
          or something I just made up because I don't have anything else to
          do.  On the other hand, for  those who need it the most, I  trust
          it brings a  level of spiritual intimacy into your  life you have
          never experienced.  If you need  help, on the other hand, let  me

                                  A Shell Of A Mess

                                   By Phil Scovell

               "Dad?"   I  think we  are  going to  have to  wake  mom," my
          daughter said.

               I was seated behind my desk typing in response  to an email.
          "What for I asked; looking  at my watch.  "It's 1 o'clock  in the
          morning.  She just went to bed 45 minutes ago.  What's wrong?"

               "Something is wrong with one of her turtles," she replied.

               "Her  turtles?" I said  with disbelief.   "What's wrong with
          the turtles?"

               "Well,"  Gretchen began, "I check the turtles every morning,
          or just about every  morning, when I get up and  walk through the
          utility room."   They both looked ok this morning when I saw them
          but Mike said he saw one on it's back tonight."

               "On his back?" I repeated.

               "Yeh.  I said that  didn't sound right because I have  never
          seen either of the turtles on their back.  So I just now went and
          checked and they are not on their backs."

               "Are they ok, then?"  I wanted to know.  Why  did you say we
          should get your mom up?"

               "Well, the one that  was on his  back earlier today has  his
          head stuck inside his shell."

               "What?" I said with amazement.  "How could that be?"

               "I don't know,"  Gretchen said, "but  it is.  I  supposed he
          was on  his back earlier,  trying to find  a position that  would
          free his head or something, " my daughter said.  "It  appears his
          head is somehow caught on the skin around his head and neck."

               "I wonder why  that would be?" I said;  picturing the turtle
          in my thoughts.

               "It appears," she  said, "that the skin around  his head and
          neck  are  very dry  or  something.   I  don't know  if  that has
          anything to do with it or not."

               "Man," I sighed.   "I don't  know what we  could do to  help

               Gretchen said, "Mike  and I are using  a Q-tip with a  small
          amount of Vaseline on it to press gently around his head and what
          little of his neck is visible.  Hopefully that will be  enough to
          give him lubrication to pop his head out."

               When she  went back  downstairs to attend  to the  turtle in
          distress, I started to pray for the turtle.

               A few  moments  later, she  came running  back upstairs  and
          said, "Dad!  It  worked.  He popped his  head free and is  moving

               "I said, "He's probably hungry,  if he hasn't eaten all day,
          so go get some meal  worms and go down and  put some in front  of
          him to  see how  much he can  move around and  to see if  he eats
          any."  Meal  worms are about a  turtle's favorite food.   You can
          almost teach a turtle how to do back flips if you offer them meal
          worms for a snack.  By the way, turtles, although  normally slow,
          can move  faster than you  can possibly imagine  when you toss  a
          grasshopper or some crickets or meal worms into their aquarium.

               She  came  back  upstairs later  and  said  that the  turtle
          gobbled  them down  as  fast as  she  could  dump them  into  the
          aquarium in front of him.  "He really went after them, too, so he
          must be ok if he can move that quickly,"  she concluded.

               "Well, it  would appear,"  I said,  "he is  going to  be ok,
          then, I guess," and so he was.

               We determined later that the  flooring we had switched to in
          the bottom of the aquarium was  making it more difficult for  the
          turtles to crawl to their swimming  pool, if you want to call  it
          that, and it seems likely that only one of the two  turtles could
          make it into  the water.  This is likely the cause for the second
          turtle to loose internal lubrication and somehow got his head and
          neck  stuck inside  his  own  shell.   We  have since  fixed  the
          flooring to make it  very easy for them to climb  into their pool
          of water.

               If you are not an animal lover, this story will have little,
          if any, meaning to you.  I mean, after all,  it was just a stupid
          turtle.  Who cares about turtles.  My wife does.  I sort of enjoy
          them, too, and had a big Arkansas  pet turtle that I caught while
          on  a vacation when I  was a kid.  Furthermore,  my wife was born
          and raised  on an Iowa farm.  Animals are  a way of life for her.
          So, the old axiom must be true; "You can take the girl out of the
          farm but you can't  take the farm out of the girl."   Thus it is,
          we have a zoo at our home and always have.

               (#1  This current event had  a strange effect upon me.   For
          the first  time in my  life, I  felt sad for  a turtle; at  least
          that's what  it felt like.  I knew my wife would be saddened that
          one of her turtles died during the  night, too.  I thought of the
          little turtle on his back as he tried finding a position where he
          was  able to free himself.  I  realized, of course, he was just a
          cold  blooded reptile  and  if  he died,  it  shouldn't have  any
          discernable effect upon me, but  something had touched me deeply.
          When I prayed for him, I thought, I was mostly praying for one of
          my wife's pets  because of her love  for her animals.   Yet, deep
          down inside,  something  else was  going on  inside of  me and  I
          didn't know what it was #1).

               (#2  As the days passed,  the thought of the trapped  turtle
          in his  own shell continually  returned to  my thoughts.   I just
          considered the thought of his plight a loose connection to my own
          experiences and  with others with  whom I pray who  often express
          being  trapped  in some  way.    Something,  on the  other  hand,
          bothered me  deeply and something  I couldn't see  spiritually on
          the surface.  I let it go for several days until I  couldn't take
          it any longer #2).

               (#3  Walking into  my office, I sat down in a  recliner in a
          corner and began  to pray.   I focused on  the turtle, the  words
          spoken that  night, and  my personal feelings  that surfaced.   I
          examined my feelings relating to how  my wife would feel when she
          found out something had happened to one  of her turtles.  Nothing
          unusual was there but normal concern for her feelings  of loss if
          the turtle died.  I finally turned to my own feelings but I could
          not,  at first,  locate anything  that seemed  applicable  to the
          situation #3).

               (#4  "Lord?" I finally said in  my thoughts, "I don't see or
          feel anything."

               "Focus more on  your thoughts," I felt the  Holy Spirit say.
          "How did you feel?"

               "Trapped?"  I  suggested.   "I  can't  think  of  any  time,
          specifically, in my life, when I felt trapped and unable to  free
          myself," I said in my thoughts as I prayed.

               There was one memory that did pop into my mind.  I had dug a
          hole with a post hole digger of my dad's and had failed to refill
          the hole when I was finished playing around.  When it snowed that
          winter, it filled the hole.  Upon walking across our backyard one
          day that winter, I  fell, with one leg,  into the hole I had  dug
          and  couldn't  extricate myself  for  a  couple  of minutes.    I
          eventually did  so, however, and  was able to walk  the remaining
          few feet  to the house without incident.   I prayed in and around
          this memory  and although there most certainly  was fear involved
          in the  memory at the  time of the  event, nothing was  there now
          because there was no fear any longer nor had any lie of the Enemy
          been implanted in my thinking at the time of the event.

               "Lord?"  I said, "I'm  looking but this  memory doesn't seem
          like the right place."  I continued looking.

               Memories  flashed  by  rapidly  but  none  of them  had  any
          feelings,  negative  feelings,  that popped  to  the  surface and
          caught my  attention.  I  was becoming frustrated because  I knew
          something had to be there but I could not find it.   I could feel
          it, on the other hand, so I continued looking as I prayed#4).

               (#5  Finally, I said again, "Lord?   If you don't show me, I
          won't  find it.  I don't recall anything  ever in my life where I
          felt trapped like that turtle  caught inside his shell and unable
          to free himself.  Where is it?" #5)

               (#6  "Womb," I heard clearly in my thoughts.

               I was suddenly at my birth.  I have never gone that far back
          in my  own memories.   Oh, sure.  I  have prayed with  dozens who
          have gone  this far  back in  their prayer  sessions but I  never
          expected it to happen  to me.  There I was,  however, being born.
          More specifically, I had not been  born quite yet.  I was  upside
          down, and about ready to be born but as I looked, everything look
          like  I was  all tangled  up in  my mother's  womb.   I felt  the
          concern and fear I had at the time #6).

               (#7  I saw a form of Jesus standing in the birthing room but
          I also saw  a dark figure standing closer to where my mother was.
          I knew, without  asking, there was a demonic  presence attempting
          to cause problems relating to  my birth but I didn't  realize, at
          first, what that  might be.   "Die," and  "kill," were two  words
          that  were  clearly  felt.   I  explicitly  recognized,  for some
          reason, an attempt on my birth was being perpetrated.  Due to the
          definite  feeling   of  emotional   and   physical  distress,   I
          immediately prayed concerning this intrusion, and against any and
          all lies or words or feelings  or thoughts, that were uttered  in
          my presence by any lying spirits  #7).

               (#8  Once the demon was commanded to remain at attention and
          forbidden to exercise communication in  any way, I asked the Lord
          what truth He wanted me to know.  I nearly laughed to myself when
          the response came.

               "I born!"

               At  first, I  felt that was  a strange  way for Jesus  to be
          talking, but when I recognized he was pleased, as he stood on the
          other side  of the room  watching, I  realized the two  words, "I
          born,  Sounded like baby talk; my baby talk.  They were, in fact,
          the words in my thoughts as I was being born.  Additionally, as I
          heard "I born" in my thoughts as I watched, I felt  I heard Jesus
          saying at the very same time, "You are born." #8).

               (#9  As I meditated on what had occurred in my short time of
          prayer,  I felt  something was  accomplished  by the  Lord in  my
          behalf which somehow was tapped into by my wife's pet turtle when
          he was trapped within  his shell.  The two words,  "I born," were
          my words of accomplishment, as in, "I made it," at least that was
          the feeling  I had during my prayer time.   This is often the way
          the Lord speaks to  me, that is, by short statements,  or mostly,
          by spiritual  awareness, of which  I put my  own words to  what I
          feel in order to explain to others what happened #9).

               I am not suggesting you  have to believe anything about what
          I have just  described.  You can  call it any numbers  of things.
          You can even believe I made the whole thing up so that is not the
          purpose  of this  testimony.    However, where  you  are in  your
          relationship with the Lord is my concern and more importantly, it
          is His concern.   The turtle reminded me of  so many with whom  I
          have prayed, some still trapped,  yet Jesus is available at every
          point in our lives to set us free.

               (#10  The turtle, apparently, just needed the refreshment of
          the  water for  lubrication.   The  Bible clearly  uses water  to
          depict the ministry and nature of the Holy Spirit and the current
          event, plus my birth, where water is also involved, began to make
          spiritual sense to me.

               Are you stuck  in your shell?   Maybe you are hiding  so you
          can't be  hurt or attacked and so you  think that you will always
          be protected.  I  understand those feelings.  So does  Jesus, for
          that matter, but he has  a way out for you.  The  ministry of the
          Holy Spirit is likewise available for every situation you face or
          have experienced.  Let Him be your shell and set you free.

          38  "He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said,  out of
          his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
          39  But this spake he  of the Spirit, which they that  believe on
          him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because
          that Jesus was not yet glorified," (John 7:38-39).

          Note.   The Greek word  for "belly" in  this passage  which Jesus
          used literally means, (the womb in which life is conceived).   He
          is referring to the human spirit that is born anew at  the moment
          of salvation.   Compare the  complete chapter of  John 3 to  this
          concept and you will understand more #10).

          I Born Happy

                                   By Phil Scovell

               This is a basic  analysis of a renewing of the  mind event I
          experienced.   If you haven't  read the testimony upon  which the
          healing is based, please do  so before reading this article.   It
          is called, "A Shell Of A Mess."

          The Design Of Prayer

          #1  Trigger Points.

               The   term  "trigger)  is  widely  used  by  therapists  and
          counselors alike to indicate a point of reaction.  It is where an
          emotional feeling occurs, which generally is a negative emotional
          response  to  a  current  event,  that  is,  something which  has
          recently occurred, normally on  the fly, in every  day life.   We
          often refer to  "trigger points" when we say  something as, "Boy,
          he  really pushed my  buttons today."   In my case, it  was a pet
          turtle, whose head was stuck in his shell, that triggered  a deep
          emotional  response  of  helplessness, or  more  specifically,  a
          feeling of  being trapped  (I'm not  going to  make  it) sort  of
          feeling.  No, this time, it wasn't going to overwhelm me  as such
          might  have  been the  case many  years  ago.   Do  to a  lack of
          knowledge  of  PTSD,  Posttraumatic  Stress  Disorder),  and  its
          characteristics  and consequences, just such an event often would
          trigger  in me,  mild  to  strong anxiety,  and  to the  extreme,
          fullblown panic attacks, and at  time, nightmares and the hearing
          of voices.

               The  word "trigger"  is  just a  simple  way therapists  and
          counselors  refer to whatever  has provoked a  negative emotional
          response.  I  might note here,  it does not  always have to  be a
          negative feeling  of  which  we  suddenly become  aware,  but  it
          generally is.

               If you  stop even  momentarily at the  second you  are being
          triggered,   you  will   recognize  the  emotional   feeling  you
          experience penetrates much deeper than at first realized.   Quite
          simply, you will detect  something feels wrong emotionally.   The
          true origin  of the problem  is often, although not  always, deep
          but the emotional  response is  on the  surface.  Thus  it is  we
          react so quickly,  or in other words, we are triggered on the fly
          as the present event unfolds.  It can be something that  has been
          repetitive throughout your entire life, such as a sudden reaction
          which invokes anger.   It  can be  something that  hurts or  even
          makes you  feel guilty  or embarrassed, or  any other  numbers of
          emotional responses such as shame, confusion, fear, grief, shame,
          rejection, resentment,  helplessness  or  powerlessness,  or  any
          combination  of negative  feelings  about yourself.    It can  be
          something as accidental  as someone cutting  you off in  traffic.
          You yell, honk the horn, and do everything but cuss, or maybe you
          do that, too,  because it triggered something and  that something
          was  anger and anger covers the pain you truly feel.  Regardless,
          any given spoken word, a thought,  a feeling, a song you hear  on
          the  radio, even  a  scent  you smell,  can  trigger the  surface
          feelings.   This surface awareness, or even  surface response, is
          not the  real problem; it  is only  the point  of awareness  that
          something is wrong.  Hence, a trigger.

          #2  Awareness.

               There are signs that what you are feeling, or seeing in your
          mind, or  whatever is struggling  up and into your  emotions, are
          signals  attempting to  gain  your  attention.   If  you have  no
          disorders, syndromes, or psychoses, these negative emotions flash
          off and on in your mind, in your memory repository,  or so it may
          seem, and won't generally bother  you at the conscious level, but
          may appear only  as a mental awareness  or an annoyance.   If, on
          the other hand, you have any emotional type disorder, even if you
          feel  depressed or perhaps discouraged, the negative emotion will
          do  more than  flash off and  on, they  will be harshly  felt and
          normally painfully.    You may  not  even remember  the  original
          event, especially if it was traumatic, because your mind may have
          attempted  to repress  or suppress  the original source  of pain.
          You haven't  forgotten, at least  your emotions haven't,  but the
          older we get, the more  difficult, even impossible, it becomes to
          push down  and cover up  by personal activity  or psychologically
          learned  behavior functionality.  Statements such as, "I'll never
          forget when," or  "I'll never let him  say that again to  me," or
          I'll never forget how much that hurt," or, "I'll never let him do
          that to  me again," are  all indicators of something  much deeper
          and has  just been  triggered, generally  speaking, by  something
          just said  or done, or even  just by a  thought, and we  felt the
          woundedness left behind in our emotions.

               A vivid  example of this, and  that I often hear  from those
          with  whom  I pray,  is  the  sound  of vomiting  which  triggers
          sickness in their  own body almost immediately.   Later, we often
          discoverer they grew up with  alcoholic parents and this retching
          sound was  commonly heard in  their family life.   This spiritual
          phenomena of repression or suppression, once we have learned  how
          the mind is  renew by the Holy Spirit,  immediately allows access
          to these deep, superficially forgotten, painful  memories through
          intercessory prayer.

          #3  Prayer.

               Go back and  read the  section marked  with 3  which I  have
          labeled "Prayer."   You  will see, simply  by reading  that brief
          section, that I am restricting  my meaning of prayer to something
          very basic and very simple.   Anyone can do it, if they are  born
          again, and you need  not be a theologian,  Bible scholar, or  you
          don't  even have  to  be  a veteran  20  year  Sunday School  pin
          representative  of   unmissed  Sunday  school   classes  (perfect
          attendance) to be able to exercise this form of prayer.

               I  always describe  this type  of prayer  by defining  it as
          "exchanging our thoughts for God's."   It is not meditation, self
          hypnosis, visualization, mental imagery, or theatrical regressive
          meditation.  It is simply talking with God by thinking.  Continue
          into  the  next  section  for   a  better  understanding  of  its

          #4  Focusing On Present Emotions.

               The way we  get to the original source,  the initial problem
          area, is by examination  of our feelings.  How  we feel now is  a
          thread  which ties  back  to where  it  all began.    All we  do,
          therefore, is follow  the string of feelings back  until the Holy
          Spirit shows us  the first, or original, place  where the feeling
          germinated.   This  is  normally a  journey  back through  memory
          events that come to mind as we pray and contains woundedness.

               Eventually, and  on God's time,  we arrive at  that original
          source of  pain.  No, we generally won't  like it there but Jesus
          knows this and He is always with you and, yes, even in the memory
          no matter how far back you might  have to go.  This time, and  in
          this specific situation, the Holy Spirit  led me back to an event
          at my birth.  It  was there, at that exact moment  in time, where
          He wanted to bring healing.

               Just about this time, people say, "Wait a minute.  I thought
          it was  all completed at the  cross so why not cut  just the head
          off  and forget  all  this  other stuff.    Try  doing that  with
          dandelions and see what happens.  I'll speak about this felonious
          theological concept later.

          #5  Origin.

               In  every  case  of  current  negative  emotional  response,
          feeling of woundedness, or mental anguish, there is going to be a
          corresponding   origin.    It  may  be  something  that  happened
          yesterday,  last week,  a month  ago,  last year,  or a  backward
          distance than  you can possibly imagine.   In this case,  I went,
          believe it or not, back  to my birth because that is where  I had
          to go to see the lie and hear the truth.

               "Wasn't that settled at the cross?"

          Yes but not  fixed, repaired, and  healed.   Jesus made the  down
          payment; the Holy Spirit healed the woundedness  that remained in
          my unregenerate emotions and mind.

          #6  Illumination and Expansion.

               This is simply the time we see what Jesus sees, or  wants us
          to  see,  concerning  the  origin  of  the  fear,  guilt,  shame,
          condemnation,  hopelessness, or anything that is out of spiritual
          or  Scriptural  syncopation.   For  example,  reoccurring  guilt,
          perpetual  shame,  ceaseless  rejection,  or  endless  fear   and

               As   Born  Again  Christians,  we  should  know,  and  fully
          understand the true application  and functionality of 1  John 1:9
          but  often  we  find  ourselves  confessing  and  confessing  and
          confessing   and  asking  for   God's  forgiveness.     We  know,
          Biblically,  He forgave  us the  first  time but  why, then,  the
          returning guilt that relentlessly returns to torture us?  The why
          is the where, that is,  where Jesus wants us to see  what He sees
          and in  the way He sees it.   In short, we are  looking for a lie
          that corresponds with the feeling we have.

               At this point,  perhaps I should comment more  on going back
          to one's  birth.  Yes,  it is true  that many cults  have similar
          practices supposedly achieved  through meditation, hypnoses, life
          regression, astral projection,  and even lucid dreaming;  just to
          name a few.  They often go beyond birth, they believe, into other
          dimensions, parallel universes, ultra states of mental awareness,
          and  even,  supposedly,  previous  lives.    We,  as  Born  Again
          Christian,  know reincarnation is  felonious theology so,  if one
          attempts, or even tries going back further than one's birth, they
          would be violating Scriptural doctrine and principle.

               It  is   now  well   known,  medically  and   scientifically
          documented, that babies are much  more aware in the womb  than we
          previously knew.   The  mind and brain  begin to  develop rapidly
          during the  third trimester.   Although few  people ever  seem to
          recall thoughts from within the womb, I have prayed with some who
          have  experienced it and as you have  read, I have as well.  This
          is one reason why I always ask a person,  with whom I am praying,
          if they were  born prematurely.  Premies, especial  those two and
          three  months before  normal nine  months  of gestation,  develop
          mentally and  emotionally outside the  womb.  They are,  in other
          words,  exposed to  anything and  everything  in their  premature
          state of development.

               One of  my earliest memories  was when, according to  my own
          mother, I  couldn't have been  over 2  or 3 months  old.  When  I
          described  in detail what  had happen, my  mother said  we had no
          pictures of that part  of the house at that point  of my life and
          there  was literally no way,  unless I did  remember, that such a
          memory was possible.

               Another  memory  I  had,  I   was  even  smaller  but  after
          discussing it  with my mother,  there was no  way to  confirm nor
          deny  the experience due to where I was  at the time.  The memory
          event had to have been when I  was, again, under 2 or 3 months of
          age but I was definitely an infant.

               "So what does this have to do with anything?" you may ask.

               It means,  if Jesus  can, and does,  access our  thoughts at
          those early stages, whose to say  the Enemy can't as well.   What
          can we do about it?  It is called prayer and taking every thought

          #7  Spiritual Warfare.

               Regardless of what you think, or have heard, or been taught,
          spiritual warfare isn't something that takes much effort.  Yes, I
          know.  I've heard all the stories, dramatic as they may be, and I
          also  realize that  some parts  of the world  have more  open and
          direct  demonic manifestative  demonstrations, but  the spiritual
          warfare aspect  of this  area of inner  healing has  already been
          accomplished by  the Lord in  our behalf.   If you want  to spend
          hours  casting out demons,  so designated, wrestling  around with
          the Enemy in various ways,  including fasting for several days or
          weeks, then  holding people down,  screaming into  their face  as
          they spit  on you, demanding  obedience from the demon  inside of
          them, and invoking specialize devised prayers until the sun comes
          up,  be my guest.   I prefer  not to screw around  that long over
          something that is  already done.  If  you are unaware of  who you
          are  in Christ, spiritual  warfare is laborious,  time consuming,
          emotionally  and  physically  draining,  and  a  very complicated
          complex process.  The Enemy makes it that way if we allow it.

               As you have  read, and as I prayed,  literally thought about
          what God was  saying and showing me,  I saw Jesus, which  I don't
          often see in this manner,  a lying spirit materialized within the
          memory picture.  This was simply Jesus revealing His presence and
          that  my  distress,  in  this  case, had  a  demonic  element  of
          involvement.   I spent  no time attempting  to address  the lying
          spirit present  at my birth but simply,  knowing he was trying to
          create fear and  worry and panic, prayed around  his presence and
          interference.   Why?   I  already knew,  the lying spirit  had no
          right to be  there in the first  place.  You see,  only Jesus has
          the power of life and death.  Satan can't take anybody's  life as
          Jesus once again proved to me in this personal prayer experience.
          Why did I know the lying spirit was there?  In my case, I saw the
          darken figure  of something  about  4 feet  tall.   I  heard  his
          thoughts,  or   words,  "Kill,  die."    I   didn't  need  visual
          confirmation to know  that he was there but the  Lord allowed its
          presence to be clearly seen so I would  understand the context of
          the memory event.  Furthermore, wherever there is a lie, there is
          a lying spirit.

          #8  God's Voice.

               Hearing the voice of the Lord doesn't mean audible, that is,
          with your ears.  It can  mean that, of course, but that would  be
          for a different reason and purpose.  What  we need to learn is to
          determine  whose speaking;  the  Lord  or the  Enemy.   A  simple
          approach to this  is knowing the truth  from a lie.   Jesus never
          lies.  If  you are not  able to recognize  the difference,  don't
          feel bad.  I was 50 years old, and had been a  Christian, at that
          point,  for 45  years, before  I  began to  learn the  difference
          between the voice of  the Lord and that of the Enemy.   As we are
          healed in various  wounded areas of our lives,  His voice becomes
          very easy  to recognize while  in a state of  open prayer without
          stopping  what we are  doing, such as  first going into  a 30 day
          fast, allowing someone to  wash our feet, pulling the car over to
          the side of the  road to climb out only to fall  on our knees, or
          face, to pray about our  guilt and sinfulness just in case  Jesus
          has overlooked our spiritual wretchedness, taking communion 10 or
          12 times  before approaching our  feelings, or maybe  reading the
          Bible from front to back before asking Jesus what in the Sam Hill
          is going on.  No, I am not making fun of any  of these things but
          if you prefer  living legalistically or by  spiritual performance
          or just  like to know you are keeping  spiritually busy, fine.  I
          used  to  live  exactly  the same  way.    I  am  more than  just
          suggesting  it isn't necessary.  Actually,  I have probably burns
          more spiritual energy  needlessly than you, or anybody  else, has

               No, in  case you  were wondering, and  in this  testimony, I
          wasn't  looking   for  Jesus  or  demons;  I   was  following  my
          woundedness back to wherever it took  me and that's all.  I  was,
          on the  other hand, listening  for His  voice at the  right time,
          which is based upon His timing and not  mine, and I heard what He

          #9  God's Word of Truth.

               Raised as  I was, none of what I  have talked about thus far
          is  acceptable.   Yes,  we  could  have  a, so  called,  personal
          relationship  with  Christ through  salvation  but salvation  had
          nothing to do with the  rest of our life.   Sure, it allowed  our
          sins  to  be  forgiven   eternally  and  it  positively   made  a
          reservation for us in Heaven when we died or when Jesus returned.
          It also made us spiritually righteous in  God's eyes.  Of course,
          how we  felt, and saw  ourselves, was a  different ball  game all

               The Word I was  taught to believe, was only the written Word
          of God.   This  is where  we get  all we  know and  believe.   No
          feelings allowed, please.  You  could feel happy about being Born
          Again, but everything was not only done  at the cross, but if you
          didn't read  it  in  the written  Word,  it wasn't  true.    This
          felonious   theology   has   probably  created   more   spiritual
          woundedness  than anything  ever taught.    Of course,  I am  not
          suggesting for a second  that the Bible isn't, in fact,  the Word
          of God.   If you are any type  of a Bible student of  the Word at
          all, of course, you  know Jesus is called, "The Word  of God," as
          well.  So, that creates a problem, does it not?

               At this point, let  me ask a question to clarify  where I am
          going with my concept.  Does the Bible tell us everything?  Wait!
          Think before you  answer.  Does  the Bible tell us,  for example,
          when the  Lord is going  to return,  at least as  far as  we know
          relating to date  and time?  We  know the Bible says  He made the
          stars but the Bible doesn't say scientifically how it occurred or
          how many stars there  are in the universe nor does it tell us the
          size of  the universe.   The son  averages 93,000,000  miles from
          earth but you won't  find that fact in  the Bible.  You can  rend
          your clothes,  cast dirt  in the  air, spit,  and walk naked  and
          barefoot  for three  years as  Isaiah did  when commanded  by the
          Lord,  (boy you better  know God's voice  for sure  before you go
          doing that  around here these days), but  you can't prove if life
          exists only on earth or elsewhere on other planets throughout the
          billions of  galaxies in  the universe.   The Bible is  silent on
          these,  and many other, theological and scientific questions that
          I plan on  asking Jesus  about the  second I  walk into  Heaven's
          door.  I hope the Lord is ready for all  the volumes of questions
          I have for Him when I arrive.

               I trust you get my point.  If you are trying to decide about
          changing jobs,  buying a  new car,  switching churches, going  to
          Africa as a missionary, which Bible seminary to attend, or if you
          should dare stop at Dairy Queen on the way home from Sunday night
          church, and you can't  find the answer in the Bible,  how are you
          going to find out what Jesus knows or wants as His  will for your

               Think of  Isaac Newton, called  the father  of physics,  for
          example.   Did he  know all he  determined about physics  and the
          universe from  the Bible?   He  wasn't even a  Christian at  that
          time.    He got  his wisdom  and  knowledge from  the  Lord, sure
          enough, but he  didn't find it in  the Bible word for  word.  Are
          you following me here or should I spell it out?

               Here  is the bottom  line.  I  judge all I hear  in the Holy
          Spirit based upon what I know from God's Word.  I trust you do as
          well.  If  we don't, we will  end up in spiritual  trouble and be
          easily deceived; it is just that simple.  So, learn the  Word, be
          discipled, and know Him through His Word.

          #10  The Holy Spirit.

               Speaking of the Holy Spirit, just how much do you know about
          Him anyhow?

               Back in the late 1970s, I was an assistant pastor in a small
          church in a small town in western Colorado.  I had been, up until
          that time, traveling and preaching as a guest speaker in churches
          around the country.  I started doing that at 23 years of age.

               One day, a  pastor friend called about a  hundred miles away
          and asked if I would come over and speak for five services on the
          book of Revelation.  I said I would and sat down and put together
          five  sermons whereby  I would  be  teaching an  overview of  the
          entire book of Revelation.

               Sometime later, I  was home thinking about  spiritual things
          and  thought I  would write  down some  notes, putting  them into
          sermons, about the Holy  Spirit.  Then I would let  other pastors
          know I had  these five sermons on the Holy Spirit available and I
          figured I could obtain other speaking engagements then.  Boy, was
          I wrong.  First of all, I couldn't even  write down a single page
          of  information  I  knew  about  the  Holy  Spirit.    Oh,  sure,
          theologically, and doctrinally, I could have written a book but I
          am talking about from personal experience.  You see, I  had none.
          I put my notes away and tried not to think about it.  I was later
          filled with the  Holy Spirit many years thereafter,  in August of
          1982 as I prayed alone in the basement of my home.

               In late 1985, I was sitting in church, half listening to the
          sermon my pastor  was preaching,  he didn't  personally know  any
          more about the Holy  Spirit than I did, and all  of the sudden, a
          flood of information began pouring into my mind.  I wrote down as
          much as I could  all during the services  and when I got home,  I
          spent  all  Sunday  afternoon writing  down  everything  that was
          coming  to mind.   I have  probably, to  date, and  from personal
          experience,  written  more on  the  Holy Spirit,  than  any other
          personal favorite topic.  

               Did you overlook, or forget, that it  is the Holy Spirit who
          was  sent to dwell within us  and to fulfill the earthly ministry
          of  Jesus after  His ascension?    I thought  so because  I often
          forget that fact even now.  Maybe  it's like the dried out turtle
          whose head  got stuck in its  shell.  A little water  goes a long
          ways when it  comes to hearing the Holy Spirit  who dwells within

          Basics Reviewed.

               You don't need to move your lips  when you pray because your
          very  life is a perpetual  prayer to God.   If, that  is, you are
          Born Again.  If not,  well, let me know and we'll  get that taken
          care of right away.

               Next, start  with a  feeling by  thinking/praying about  it.
          This will be, generally, a negative feeling and  it might be down
          right  emotionally  painful  and  psychologically  uncomfortable.
          When  it  feels  like  something  is  wrong,  there is  generally
          something wrong.

               Take that feeling and think/focus  on it.  Let the feelings,
          the  real feelings,  associated with  the  woundedness you  feel,
          surface in your thoughts and emotions.

               Ask  the Lord  from where  these feelings  and thoughts  are
          coming.  Then  look for a memory, that is, feel  for a memory, by
          letting the  negative emotion point  you in the  right direction.
          You  generally  end up  in  a memory  some  place  in your  life.
          Examine the memory for what feels wrong,   Ask the Holy Spirit to
          show you what Jesus  sees.  If you find nothing,  ask the Lord to
          take you  to  another memory  where  these same  feelings  exist.
          Eventually, a  memory will  surface  which is  almost always  the
          memory  that has an imbedded lie,  thus, the presence of the pain
          in  the first place  is found.   Whenever you arrive  at a memory
          event, ask  the Lord  to show  you the  lie embedded within  that
          memory  event.  If there  is one, you'll know it  for a fact when
          you see it.

               When you  recognize the lie  for what it  is worth, ask  the
          Lord to show  you His truth.   In my case,  based upon this  true
          story, I was  having difficulty at birth and that  fear allowed a
          lying spirit  to try and make me think I would die.  I don't care
          if you believe this part or not  but it is exactly what the  Lord
          revealed to  me as  I prayed.   I wasn't  hypnotized, meditating,
          using guided imagery,  nor had I smoked any pot or hash that day.
          In fact, I haven't smoked anything since I was 16 years  old and,
          yes, I did inhale.

               When you  hear the truth, you'll know it.   You then will be
          free, totally free,  and if ever returning to  this memory again,
          there won't ever be any more woundedness.  This does not mean the
          memory has been altered; it just means it has been healed and the
          lie cannot cause you  any more pain.  If that  memory still hurts
          when it returns or you focus on it, there is more to be  revealed
          within that event and possibly at a later time.

               Finally, this is  all I do, pray with people, that is, so if
          you need help, let me know.  It is common, at first, to hit blank
          walls and this is when two, praying  in agreement, are able to do
          things we cannot accomplish  on our own, (See Matthew  18:18-19).
          So  don't let it discourage  you from continuing  and if you need
          help, let me know.

                               End Of Document

     Safe Place Fellowship
     Phil Scovell
     Denver, Colorado - Mountain Time Zone
     Web:  WWW.SafePlaceFellowship.COM
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