Note. this is part of my book found elsewhere on this site. The testimony of healing, however, fits well in this section.

                           CHAPTER 11  MY DAUGHTER IS GONE

               The first time our daughter ran away,  she was only 13 years
          of age.   Fortunately we  found her within  about four  hours but
          those four hours were emotionally like nothing my wife and I have
          ever experienced.  Furthermore, the pain of this event was firmly
          and sharply and painfully embedded in my memory.

               As the  years passed, my  daughter ran away two  more times.
          She had a child when  she was 16 years old.  Later,  when she did
          marry,  she  had  a second  child.    Due to  her  life  style of
          cigarette  and  dope  smoking,  drinking  alcohol, taking  drugs,
          living immorally,  having an  abortion, and  criminal activities,
          which eventually  resulted in  her felony arrest,  my wife  and I
          obtain  guardianship of  her oldest  son.   The youngest  son was
          still under the custody of his real father.  Over the  years, and
          more than  once, I had to ask her to leave our home, no longer to
          live  with us,  because light  and darkness  simply do  not dwell
          together without conflict.

               When  my daughter  was 24  years  of age,  she began  living
          immorally and moving in with different friends and using more and
          more drugs.   She and  her husband  separated and her  life style
          grew worse and  she drifted further  away from  the Lord and  her
          family.

               One summer, on the 4th of  July, she told us that she  would
          be at our home  to spend that evening with her boys.  She did not
          call or show up that night.  We tried calling her at the last two
          telephone numbers  we  had for  her  but  no one  new  where  our
          daughter  was.  I became  angry.  After you have  been lied to by
          the  same person for many  years, you would  think that you would
          become acclimated to it and invulnerable to any emotional effects
          related to it.  When, however, it comes to the well being of your
          own flesh and  blood, that  is, our  own grandchildren,  emotions
          easily surface.  In this case, and for me, it was anger.

               My anger  was strong enough to keep me awake that night till
          well  after  midnight.   At first  I  considered my  anger  to be
          perfectly  natural and  justified,  under the  circumstances, and
          perhaps I  was correct.   After all,  my grandchildren  were once
          again being cheated out of not having their mother with  them for
          the night.   As their  grandfather, I was  simply right down  mad
          they were being left out again.

               As  my mind  focused on  many other  such similar  things my
          daughter had done over the  years, old emotions began to surface.
          I easily  remembered the most  painful event; the first  time she
          ran away.  Let me describe that night briefly so you will have  a
          better understanding of what I am about to explain.

               One evening, I was working in my office, a room on  the side
          of our home, when  I heard a car door and  the vehicle pull away.
          I immediately felt in my spirit that something was wrong.  I left
          my office and went through the house calling for my kids.  My two
          boys  came but Gretchen was no where to  be found.  My boys and I
          began searching her  room and soon found her note.  "Dad and Mom,
          I am leaving because I want to live with others.  Don't worry.  I
          will be fine.   The woman  I am living  with doesn't even  smoke.
          Signed:  Gretchen."  After  finding her hand written note telling
          us she had run away, we began calling all of her friends.  During
          the  times we  waited for  something to  happen and  calls to  be
          returned,  I would go out  to the front yard  and sit on a cement
          flower  box and pray  that my daughter  would come back.   Yes, I
          cried.  Yes,  I was angry.  Yes,  I was horribly afraid.   I kept
          straining  my ears  to hear  a  car driving  up  into our  gravel
          driveway or  the  footsteps of  my  daughter walking  across  the
          gravel coming home  but they never came.   All sorts of  dreadful
          thoughts flooded  my mind, as  one might imagine.   "Would she be
          hurt  or killed?   Would she ever  come back; would  we ever hear
          from her again?  What  if she were kidnapped?   What if she  were
          raped?"  Under the circumstances, our concerns were certainly not
          abnormal.   When we  found her, she  and her girl  friend had run
          away together and were staying with two 28 year old men.   One of
          them had just been released from prison.  As I said, this was one
          of the most  painful events I ever  had with our daughter  but it
          would be far from the last.

               On the night of the 4th of July, as I mentioned, this memory
          event came to mind.  Gretchen not being home that night triggered
          the earlier memory and I  recall saying to myself, "I  will never
          forget  that  night  as  long  as  I  live."    Why?    Because I
          experienced such deep pain and  sorrow and such real genuine fear
          for my daughter's safety.  After all, I was  her father and I was
          reacting naturally and normally as any father might.

               Suddenly, I  realized this would  be a good  opportunity for
          some healing.   Why?  Because the pain  of that initial event was
          still  very  real and  very deep.   I  prayed silently  and said,
          "Lord, what is the source of this pain in this event?"  The  Lord
          began showing  me how, as I sat in  the front yard waiting for my
          13 year old daughter to return, fear began to take over and I was
          bombarded with multiple concepts  of fear.  Many of those ideas I
          have already mentioned.  I could clearly see a sad father  out in
          that  front yard, sitting  on the edge of  the cement flower box,
          waiting for his lost run away  daughter.  I felt the sadness  and
          the fear and worry and the total helplessness building in the man
          I saw in that memory.  I asked the Lord to point out all the lies
          the were going into my thoughts at that time and He did.  Seizing
          them all, I  gave them to the  Lord.  I still felt  deep pain and
          sorrow in the event however.

               I asked  the Lord, "Lord Jesus,  did I miss  something?  Was
          there something demonic in that event?"  I didn't see anything as
          I  prayed but  the second I  asked this  question of the  Lord, a
          demonic form appeared standing near me in the memory.  He was, at
          that moment,  about four  feet tall.   He  was dark  and had  the
          shape, for the most part, of a human with a head, arms, and legs.
          Otherwise, I saw  no other physical details.   As the  Lord Jesus
          continued pulling out the lies and naming  them for me so I would
          know what they  were, fear, doubt, worry,  concern, helplessness,
          loss, loneliness, death, physical harm  and so on, the demon grew
          smaller  in size.  In fact, he began  to shrink rapidly.  When it
          seemed  the Lord  was done pulling  the lies from  my thinking at
          that time of the memory, the demon had  changed form.  He was now
          about the size of your little finger and he looked exactly like a
          large  black ant.  He  was standing on the  ground in front of me
          and as I watched, he slowly turned and began walking away from me
          and down the street.  He did not crawl along the ground as an ant
          but was standing  upright and walking on his back legs.  He would
          stop occasionally and look back.  I noticed he had a look  on his
          face that was trying to express something but at first I couldn't
          determine its  meaning.  He  stopped and turned back  a couple of
          times in  this same manner and then I  recognized the look on his
          face.  He was saying, "Do I really have to go?"  I almost laughed
          out loud.  I  did speak out loud when I addressed  him.  "Yes, I"
          said, "you have to go."  He turned and kept walking away, growing
          smaller and smaller in the distance, as he walked down the street
          and he never  looked back again.  As he walked away with his back
          to me, I added, "And don't you ever come back either, in the name
          of  the True  Lord Jesus  Christ."   This entire  time in  prayer
          lasted about one minute from beginning to end.

               When the memory faded in my thoughts, I noticed my anger was
          ebbing away as well.  I focused on the memory once again and felt
          around  emotionally  to see  if there  was  any more  pain  but I
          couldn't find any of the pain still  in the memory.  Now, several
          days later, the  memory, even when I  go to it, doesn't  hurt and
          there is no  deep pain or  sorrow.  In  fact, what I  really feel
          now, when I focus on the memory, is peace and freedom.


          THE MEMORY EVENT EXPLAINED

               I want to  point out several different aspects  of this true
          story.

               1.   It  should  be clearly  seen in  this  true story  that
          events, over which we may have no control, allow demons to gain a
          foothold in a Christian's life.  I had done nothing wrong nor had
          I committed  any sin.   Yet,  due to  the fear  generated by  the
          circumstances, that is, the unknown of my daughter's whereabouts,
          I  unknowingly and  innocently  gave  place to  the  devil in  my
          thoughts  and he  exploited  the  opportunity  by  amplifying  my
          natural fears and concerns.

               2.   This story demonstrates the  healing power of  God.  My
          daughter was 24 years of age at the time I focused on the 11 year
          old memory.  Yet, I even said to myself, "I will never forget how
          I felt that night  she ran away  for the first  time."  Not  only
          could I never forget it but the truth was, my sorrow and fear was
          buried deep.  It was so deep, I never knew it was there.  Why?  I
          had been deceived by the devil in agreeing with his words instead
          of God's.  Thus, I had given the devil  a legal right to continue
          trying to operate in my life.

               As I was reliving, as it were, that memory, I asked the Lord
          Jesus to show me His truth about this event in my life.  He first
          told me that He was there with  me as I sat on the cement  flower
          box waiting for  my daughter  so I  wasn't alone even  if I  felt
          otherwise.  I asked  Him to show me more about why I hurt so much
          and  so  deeply.   He  then revealed  a  number  of demonic  lies
          implanted in my mind.   I asked the Lord Jesus  to identify those
          lies and to speak His truth  to me about them.  That was  when He
          began removing  them one by one.  It  literally appeared to me as
          if the Lord were pulling foot long sharp thorns out of my back as
          I sat  patiently waiting.   He did it  so rapidly, I  cannot even
          identify everything  He removed from me that night but I felt the
          relief when He was done.

               3.  Anger masked the lies in this memory.  The anger kept me
          from seeing the true  nature of the memory itself.   Once I asked
          the Lord to  take me beyond the  anger and to the true  nature of
          the pain,  the anger  no longer was  able to  hide my  deepest of
          feelings.    In  conducting  intercessory  prayer  sessions  with
          others, I  almost always find  anger masking the pain.   Usually,
          just  below the anger, is fear,  or some other emotion, and below
          the  fear is the pain.   As long as the  anger and fear are still
          there,  the  devil  has  license  to  continue  manipulating  our
          emotions through  tossing more  fiery darts of  a similar  nature
          into our thoughts and feelings.

               4. What I  have just described  is what the Bible  calls The
          renewing of the mind.  This is clearly identified in Romans 12:1-
          2, Ephesians  4:22-27 and James  1:21.  Also  compare Philippians
          3:7-15.

               I was  talking with a  Christian lady one  day who  has many
          painful memories in  her past.  She  was telling me that  she had
          gone  through a  year and  a half  of  conventional psychological
          therapy.  The bulk of secular therapy today is focused upon going
          forward.  That is, first identify the problem, accept it for what
          it is, and  then walk  away from  it; never looking  back.   This
          sounds good  and works well for many  people to a certain degree.
          It is not a Biblical principle, however, but is the best  man can
          do.   The  unfortunate aspect  of  this philosophy  is that  many
          Christians  believe  it  is  somehow  Scriptural  and  thus,  God
          ordained.  God heals our woundedness by the Biblical principle of
          renewing the mind.  

               This lady  told me that she did not  need to go backwards in
          her  life so she needed no intercessory  prayer.  Her husband, in
          her opinion, on the other hand,  needed it desperately and if the
          Lord would  fix her husband, she would be happy.  May I point out
          that this  woman's victory  now can only  be accomplished  if her
          husband submits  to her way  of thinking  concerning the  marital
          relationship?  What if he doesn't?  Does that mean she will still
          be in  bondage?   If  she holds  fast to  the idea  that God  has
          finished His work  in her life  and her  mind needs no  renewing,
          then she is, in fact, in bondage.   Bondage isn't the will of God
          for anyone.

               My  point is this.   If you  believe all was  settled at the
          cross for you,  then you cannot obey  the command of the  Lord to
          renew your  mind.  Yes,  all was finished  upon the cross  by the
          Lord Jesus salvitically  but to complete our fellowship  with Him
          throughout  the rest of our  life, there must  be the renewing of
          the mind in areas of woundedness.   If this is not done, we allow
          the  devil  to   function  behind  the  scenes;   corrupting  our
          relationship with the Lord through deceitfulness.

               5.   A deep pain I had been  literally carrying inside of me
          for 11  years was triggered by a current event in my life.  It is
          true  that my daughter was in both events, that is, in the one 11
          years ago, and again  on July the 4th but this  is not always the
          case.  Once the devil has a legal right, spiritually speaking, to
          throw  his fiery  darts, events  need  not be  identical or  even
          similar.  This same anger I experienced could have been triggered
          by some other current event in my  life.  The woundedness is then
          tapped and out  comes the hurt  and the  pain and the  subsequent
          reaction to that pain is acted out in our emotions and feelings.

               6.   I  was  healed.   I  know  many Christians  attempt  to
          identify this  type of prayer  as new age mind  renewal, hypnotic
          suggestiveness,  visual manipulation,  creative meditation,  self
          hypnosis, and even demon hunting, but the truth  is, I was healed
          by the  True Lord Jesus Christ.  As  Jesus said Himself, if Satan
          would cast out himself, he would be dividing himself from his own
          kingdom.  See  Matthew 12:22-32.  I  did not create  or fabricate
          this memory, I  was just remembering it due to  the pain embedded
          in the past event.  I wasn't  meditating or trying to generate an
          supernatural aura of  some kind; I was just  praying and allowing
          the Lord Jesus to minister  to me.  Satan was defeated, I was set
          free  from the  pain, and  another  door was  slammed on  demonic
          access to my life.

               I new I  was healed for three  reasons.  First, the  pain of
          the  memory no  longer hurt.   Second, I  can return to  the same
          memory at any time and the  pain is still gone.  Third,  my anger
          began to subside that I had toward  my daughter.  Does that sound
          like the devil or God?

               7.  Something I haven't mentioned related to this true story
          is what I did once the Lord Jesus  healed me.  Now realizing that
          I had  in fact given place to the  devil and allowed his thoughts
          and feelings to become mine, I confessed this to the Lord as sin.
          Why?  Because  I recognize I had given Satan ground upon which to
          gain a  foothold in my life.   Now that I was healed  and saw the
          situation as the  Lord saw  it, I  prayed and took  back all  the
          ground I had given the devil and gave it back to the Lord for His
          honor  and  glory.    This  closed  off  the  demons  ability  to
          communicate further with me with his thoughts and feelings.

               8.   When the demonic  figure seen  in my  memory shrank  in
          size, it  spiritually depicted his  loss of authority in  my life
          through that event.  As he walked away, he was unable to verbally
          communicate with me.  Why?   Because he had no more  access to my
          renewed mind in  this area.  I had been healed  of all related to
          that one event.   When I realized  he was thinking, "Do  I really
          have to go?" it was because I spiritually sensed in my spirit the
          Holy Spirit telling me this was what the demon was thinking.  The
          demon could not communicate his  thoughts directly to my thoughts
          any longer because he had no more legal right to do so.

               9.  Behavior modification and other psychological techniques
          would not have  worked in this healing  process.  In fact,  I had
          been, for many years, been  confessing God's Word, praying for my
          daughter,  being faithful  in my  walk with  the Lord,  and doing
          everything  else a Christian  should be doing.   Yet, I still had
          given place to the devil in a time of weakness unknowingly.  With
          this spiritual license  to now function in my  life, fear, doubt,
          loneliness,  helplessness, and many other such things were easily
          tapped into  by the  demonic realm  and exploited.   My  point is
          this.  Even quoting  God's Word in this situation would  not make
          me feel any  better.  Why?   I had given the devil  a foothold in
          which he could operate.   No, I  had not turned  my life over  to
          Satan.   No, I had  no demon dwelling inside  of me; he  just had
          access  to my thoughts  and feelings because  I had, unknowingly,
          given him  place to  function.   Unless the  Lord Jesus  shows us
          these areas which need the  renewing of our minds, we will  still
          find ourselves attempting to deal  with very painful past  events
          in our lives.

          Comments.

               I   realize  many  Christians  do  not  believe  in  demonic
          influence once a person  has been born  again.  They may  believe
          demons have  some access to our  lives as Christians  but only in
          the area of sin.   As I pointed out, this had  nothing to do with
          sin in my life.  The event 11 years ago had nothing to do with me
          committing  sin and even  my anger  this time  was not  unjust or
          unholy;  it was  the  result  of frustration  and  concern.   The
          circumstances,  and the strong  raw emotions associated  with the
          event, created an atmosphere in which I was spiritually sensitive
          and vulnerable.   I did not realize  I had let down  my shield of
          faith which would have  protected me from all the fiery  darts of
          the  devil.    I was,  in  fact,  too busy  being  afraid  for my
          daughter's whereabouts and safety.  When a demon, therefore, took
          advantage of  this situation by tossing a few of his thoughts and
          feelings upon my thoughts and feelings, the seeds, or ideas, were
          planted and I reacted to them unawares.  Over the years, the pain
          deepened and anger helped suppress the pain.  It then took an act
          of God, if  you please, to reach  into my mind, expose  the lies,
          and to heal  my broken heart and to  renew my deceived mind.   In
          short, God used  a current day experience for His honor and glory
          in order to heal an old  wound that was effecting my relationship
          with  him, and my daughter, all these years.  If you are going to
          give anybody the credit, therefore,  praise God and not the devil
          for this healing in my life.

                             End Of Chapter

                               THE DECEITFULNESS OF SIN


                                          By

                                     Phil Scovell

                                  Copyright (C) 2003

                                 All rights Reserved

          Reproduction of the following is granted by the copyright holder,
          Phil Scovell, if such reproduction is done in the spirit in which
          it was given.   It may not  be reproduced and sold  for financial
          gain without  written permission  of the  copyright holder:  Phil
          Scovell.   Electronic formats may  be distributed freely but this
          copyright notice must  remain with each copy and  the text cannot
          be  altered  in  any  way.    For   convenience,  this  copyright
          notification  may  be  placed  at  the end  of  the  document  if
          reproduced electronically.


          CONTACT INFORMATION

          Phil Scovell
          840 South Sheridan Boulevard
          Denver, Colorado  80226-8017
          Web:  WWW.RedWhiteAndBlue.ORG
          Web:  WWW.SafePlaceFellowship.com

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