It Sounds Like God To Me

© Copyright 2007 by Phil Scovell - All Rights Reserved



                                       1

                          I Flew Kites With Jesus


                              By Phil Scovell




     Disclaimer

     Author's Note.
          It is recommended that you  not even remotely attempt to  try the
     basic principles  you think  you see in  this testimony.   There  is a
     great deal more one needs to know than  what you read here and this is
     not a "How To" article.

     End of author's note.




                                  Preface



          On  November  13, 1963,  my  father died.    He had  been  in the
     hospital for three weeks; the last two of which he was comatose.
          After  six months  and more  than a dozen  eye operations,  I was
     pronounced totally blind on November 13, 1964; exactly one year to the
     day of my father's death.  Two weeks following being released from the
     hospital, I left home for a school for the blind.


                                  Introduction


          I have never met a person who has lived a  charmed life, that is,
     someone who has not suffered  loss or some traumatic experience during
     some time  of their life.   Because I was  raised in a  good Christian
     home, I was different, I thought, until the Lord showed me how wrong I
     was.
          Sitting in the Christian therapist's office for the first time, I
     began by telling him I had been raised in a wonderful  Christian home,
     was never mistreated, and overall, I had a wonderful childhood.  After
     spending  the next  twenty minutes  explaining to  him all  the things
     happening  in my life that were causing  me anxiety and panic attacks,
     sleepless nights, and nightmares when I did sleep, he said, "Phil, you
     have experienced some pretty traumatic events in your life."
          "I have?" I replied; puzzled.
          "Well,  your  father's  sudden death  and  your  blindness coming
     exactly one year later to the day.  That's two events which are pretty
     traumatic."
          Frankly, I had  never considered my dad's death  and my blindness
     as  traumatic.  I  thought that was a  term used when  you were in car
     wrecks, plane  crashes, got hit  by a speeding  car, or when  you fell
     down  a  flight  of stairs  and  broke  all the  bones  in  your body.
     "Trauma?  Me?"  I was even more shocked when he continued talking.
          "In all the years of my practice as a Christian therapist, I have
     discovered that psychology doesn't work and is  a band aid at best for
     the problems people face as Christians."
          My heart sank.  This was my last hope.  I had been suffering from
     horrifying frightening anxiety for six weeks; day and night.  I was on
     medication  I didn't  want to take  but felt  I had  no choice.   As a
     Christian, I considered  myself to be a  total failure and I  knew I'd
     never serve the  Lord again.  Maybe, just  maybe, if I could   stay on
     the medications and get some  Christian psychological help, I could be
     half  a person  and could experience  happiness occasionally  over the
     balance of my  life.  The  way I felt,  I probably wouldn't live  that
     much longer in the first place.   Now, here's this guy, my last  hope,
     telling me what he is trained for, and what I came for to get, doesn't
     work.  He was still talking.
          "What I  have found that works  is something the  Bible calls the
     renewing of the mind."
          I almost cried.  I  knew the next thing he  was going to tell  me
     was something  about a  new age  inner healing  cult he  was in  which
     involved  personal management  skills,  a  buzz  phrase  for  behavior
     modification,  along  with  visualization  and  daily  meditation  and
     affirmations.  I readied myself to  stand at his next words because  I
     was going to walk out of his office.
          Suddenly,  part  way  through  his  explanation  of  this  prayer
     ministry he was  talking about, I stopped  him and said, "Do  you know
     what an intercessor is?"
          "I sure do," he replied.
          "Well," I  said, "I've  been an intercessor  since 1985  and this
     sounds  exactly like  a  form  of focused  intercessory  prayer."   He
     agreed.
          Over the next  few months, I visited  his office nine times.   We
     prayed  together for  ninety minutes  to  three hours  in each  prayer
     session.  The Lord began to totally change my life.
          Oddly,  before  the manic  depression and  the anxiety  and panic
     attacks  began, the Lord told  me one day that  He was leading me into
     another type of  intercessory prayer ministry which would  normally be
     conducted on  a one-to-one bases.   I  had no idea  what the  Lord was
     talking about and  I told Him so.   Besides, I could  already feel the
     depression coming on and was doing everything in my power to  stop its
     advance and intrusion into my life.
          When the depression  came, it buried me alive  in anxiety, panic,
     raw  unadulterated terror, nightmares, sleeplessness, and voices in my
     head I could not silence even when using the name of Jesus.  Six weeks
     into the depression, the Lord repeated His call upon my life.  I cried
     out  to the Lord and told Him I  had no idea what He was talking about
     and that He would have to help me find people who understand this type
     of intercessory prayer.   That very week,  the Lord led me  to someone
     who was doing exactly  what He was trying to explain  to me concerning
     His will  for my life.  Less  than a year after my  first visit to the
     Christian therapist, I was doing  the same type of intercessory prayer
     work with others that he had been doing with me.
     The Purpose
          The purpose of  this testimony is  to detail how,  and what,  the
     Lord did  in one of my prayer  sessions.  I want to  show how the Lord
     took me  back to a pair of  memories which were connected  and how the
     Lord healed and  renewed my mind from  all the woundedness and  pain I
     had been suffering for  nearly my entire life.  I want to show how the
     Enemy works and how we learn to believe the lies of the Enemy  instead
     of  God's Word.  You  will clearly see how,  as a Christian, I carried
     anger in my  heart for nearly forty  years because of lies  I believed
     which were implanted by the Enemy.
     Anger
          Three days before  Christmas My youngest son  and I had  a strong
     disagreement.  He was 21 years  old at the time and I was  51 years of
     age.   I am humbled  to say it  was more of  a shouting match  than an
     argument and some  very terrible unchristian things were  said by all.
     I had already  done a hundred hours of prayer time with many different
     people and  seen some  amazing  things happen.    Plus, I  had  prayed
     through many things by myself in my own life and also experienced many
     dramatic healings of woundedness.  So,  I should have known better and
     demonstrated more responsibility.  Instead, my son touched a sore spot
     and  that  tapped into  old  woundedness  and  out rushed  the  anger;
     protecting  lies buried deep within  my life.   As usual, however, the
     Lord took what the  Enemy meant for evil and turned it to good because
     I called out to Him for help.
          After my  son left, I prayed and asked  the Lord where this anger
     was coming from  but I was too  emotionally involved to hear  from the
     Lord at that time.  Even later that night, when the anger was less but
     still burned, I tried praying to locate the original source but  all I
     could feel was a vague memory that was nearly forty years old and  the
     pain was deeply  imbedded.  I could  not get to  where I hurt  without
     agreement in  prayer.   It just so  happened, I  had a  prayer session
     scheduled  in a couple of days with Bret; the same Christian therapist
     I had prayed with before.
     The Prayer Session
          After spending  a few  minutes visiting  about things  in general
     concerning our separate ministries,  Bret said, "Anything going  on of
     late,  Phil?"  I  told him  there were lots  of little  things but the
     argument with my  son had stirred up  anger that I didn't  know I had.
     So we agreed we would start with the anger.  First we prayed and asked
     for God's direction and blessings on our time in prayer.
          While praying  on my  own for  the last  year, I  often ended  up
     thinking about the time I  lost my sight.  The memory that always came
     to mind, was where I saw myself on my back in a large hospital ward of
     about forty beds.  I was twelve years of age at the  time.  The minute
     we began  to pray about  the anger I had  experienced just a  few days
     earlier, I was back in that hospital ward.  I said as much to Bret.
          "Lord," he prayed, "would you show Phil, by your Holy Spirit, why
     he is angry in this memory?"
          Suddenly, in  an instant of time, I  knew.  I was  angry with God
     for letting me go blind.  Why didn't He stop it.  Additionally, I  saw
     the anger turn  inward against  myself.  I  felt as if  somehow I  had
     failed God and my family.   I spoke these raw tender hurting  emotions
     out as I  felt them so Bret could  hear what the Lord  had revealed in
     this memory.
          "Holy Spirit,  is there more in this memory  you want Phil to see
     and feel?" he asked.
          "Why did He let  my dad die?  He took my father  from me," I said
     aloud as I felt the pain.  More hurt and pain tumbled out as we prayed
     and the Holy Spirit  gently put his finger on each  wounded area of my
     life; dislodging them.
          "Lord Jesus," I heard Bret praying again, "is there anything else
     the  Holy Spirit  needs Phil  to  see in  the painful  event  you have
     brought back to his memory today?"
          I waited  for a few moments but nothing  happened.  "I don't feel
     anything," I reported.
          "Do  you  feel blocked  or  confused  or  like there  is  perhaps
     something hindering you?"
          I  said, sighing  heavily,  "I don't  know; I  don't feel  or see
     anything."
          Bret  said,  "Do you  mind if  we check  to see  if there  is any
     demonic activity in this memory?"
          "No," I don't mind," I said quietly.  After all, we had done this
     a  dozen times before in  previous prayer session  just like this one.
     Now, however, I wasn't afraid of demons so it would be easier.
          "Lord Jesus," he prayed, "we need your help.  We cannot do any of
     this  alone.  If there was  some demonic spirit oppressing Phil during
     this tender time of  his life, and planting lies, we want to know what
     you know.  We refuse any demonic spirits to  speak other than what you
     allow  them to  speak as  Lord and  Master of  all principalities  and
     powers.  If they break this rule, we  will turn them over to you to go
     wherever you might send them."
          I saw, at this moment, a  demonic figure standing by my  hospital
     bed.  He was dark  as night and bent over at  the waist as if he  were
     bending his head closer in order  to speak to me.  I felt  the lies he
     spoke; I heard nothing.  I reported to Bret what I felt and saw.
     Note.
          Before  continuing,  let  me  make  a  comment  about  what  just
     happened.  I do not always see a demonic presence in memories of which
     the Lord reminds me.  In  fact, I rarely see them in memories  at all.
     In this case, and probably due to  my young age, the Lord wanted me to
     clearly  see that  the thoughts I  was having  were not mine  but lies
     implanted in  my  thinking.   Years  later, as  an  adult and  in  the
     ministry, I would have  all the same feelings coming out  in every day
     life as current  events tapped into the lies and released the pain and
     woundedness associated with those same lies.  Yet, I would be  totally
     unawares  of  the source  of  all  those  negative  emotions  creating
     problems for me as an adult.
          I  heard Bret praying  again and asking the  Lord what other lies
     were planted into my thinking at this time.  Tears came to my eyes and
     I cried when I felt the emotions of  the lie which was revealed by the
     Holy Spirit.   "I feel like  God doesn't love  me for some  reason," I
     said softly.
          "Holy  Spirit, what  is  the truth  you want  Phil to  know about
     this?"
     Note.
          At this point, I cannot  exactly explain what occurred because of
     the tremendous  power and  spiritual intimacy I  felt coming  from the
     Lord.  I actually figured the Lord would tell me the same thing He has
     often  said to others with whom I  have prayed.  He often simply says,
     "I love you,"  or something  equally basic  in nature.   You may  know
     Scripturally and doctrinally and theologically  that God loves you but
     when  He says it  to you Himself,  you will never  forget the feeling.
     However, no  such thing was said.  In fact, no words were spoken but a
     single powerful impression came to me  and I felt it on the inside  of
     me.  In my own words, this is what I felt the Lord was saying.
          "You are  expecting me to say I love  you from outside of you but
     this is not  the way it works.   I am  on the inside  of you and I  am
     love.  Therefore,  because I am in you,  my love for you  is inside of
     you where I am and always  present.  There is no need for  me to speak
     of this  love outwardly  because I am  in you  and that  is where  you
     should look for it."
          Frankly, this made sense to me.  I never actually recalled my dad
     saying he loved me.  I'm sure he did but I just don't recall him doing
     so.  I  always knew my  dad loved me,  however, without him  having to
     tell me.   How  did I know  this?   Because of how  he treated  me and
     talked to me and spent  time with me.  Now,  what the Holy Spirit  was
     speaking to me  about the love of God was being intimately revealed to
     me in spiritual terms and I understood.
          What  I said out loud  to Bret was nothing  like this at the time
     because  I could not  explain it until  several hours later.   I still
     have  trouble explaining it  because, as I  said, there were  no words
     spoken and I heard  nothing.  What I felt in my  spirit was a mingling
     or intertwining, or a  weaving as if a loom was being used to create a
     tightly woven piece  of cloth.  At  this very moment, I  strongly felt
     that  the Lord  was  talking to  me  about a  new  partnership He  was
     establishing  with  me.   What  I said  out  loud  was, "Something  is
     happening theologically which  I cannot explain in words  but the love
     of God  is somehow, and  in some way,  a part of  me and inside  of me
     because that is where the Lord said He is."
          He prayed  and said, "Holy  Spirit, what do  you want Phil  to do
     with these things you have revealed to him?"
          I simply prayed at that time and let the Lord take all these lies
     and phony emotions implanted into my thoughts.
          "What's going on now, Phil," he asked.
          I said, "Everything seems to be gone."
     Note.
          The demonic figure I saw standing by my bed, as we prayed and the
     Lord  began exposing  his  lies,  started to  diminish  in size.    He
     eventually shrank to something just a few  inches tall and he lost all
     his form and shape.  In fact, what remained of  him was something that
     looked very much like a scribbling child's doodling; abstract and made
     up of random lines.
          Then I spoke and said, "There's one thing left now."
          "What's that, Phil," Bret asked.
          "I feel lonely.  I feel all alone and by myself."
          "Holy Spirit,  show Phil  what you  want him  to know about  this
     loneliness he feels," Bret prayed.
          At that very moment, the memory picture of being in  the hospital
     and laying on my back instantly vanished and was replaced with another
     memory.   I was at the graveside  service of my father.   I saw myself
     and my mom and all the other people on one side of the casket.  On the
     opposite side of the casket, I saw  Jesus.  He seemed as if He  wanted
     to say  something or do  something but I  couldn't understand  what it
     was.   I also felt the anger firmly rooted  in this memory and that it
     had  not come from  the hospital  memory at all.   I reported  this to
     Bret.
          "Lord Jesus, what  do you want  to do with  Phil's anger that  he
     feels?" Bret prayed.
          "He wants  me to give it  to him." I replied  without hesitation.
     So I prayed and gave it to the Lord.
          "Holy Spirit," he prayed,  "what is it now that you  want Phil to
     know or to understand about this memory event in his life?"
          I laughed.
          "What is it?" Bret asked.
          "Well," I replied, "I can see  myself standing on the other  side
     of the casket.  I am smiling and saying, "Can I go play now?"
          Bret laughed, too.  "Sure.  Nothing wrong with that."
          I saw the Lord still standing on the other side of the casket.  I
     felt He was saying, "Come with me."
          I said, "Come with you where?"
          Jesus  raised in arm  as if to  say, "Follow me."   Instantly the
     memory picture of the graveside service vanished and I was back at the
     home  where I grew  up.  Jesus was  walking next to  me into the field
     next  to our home where I used to fly  my kites.  My dad taught me how
     to fly  kites in that  very field.   As  we walked out  into the  warm
     sunshine of the summer day, I saw myself carrying a red kite and I saw
     another kite flying high overhead and it was red as well.  Although  I
     noticed it at the time, I didn't  understand about the second red kite
     in  the sky until many days  later.  The second  kite flying high over
     head had  no string attached.  I remember  being puzzled about this at
     the time but just dismissed it as  unimportant.  Now I know the second
     red kite  belonged to the  Lord.  He needs  no string when  He flies a
     kite.  It was already in the air to tell me His kite always flies high
     and never  touches down; no  strings attached.  Furthermore,  it later
     came to mind that  my kite was red  just like my Father's; Jesus.   We
     shared relationship now in the  form of spiritual intimacy that passes
     all  understanding.   The two  red  kites, in  other words,  stood for
     mutual identity.
          As we walked, the man next to me was clearly Jesus and felt  like
     Jesus but he also  felt just like my  father.  Yet  I knew it was  the
     Lord.  I reported this to Bret.
          Keep in mind  that what I just  described was not a  memory I was
     seeing.  Additionally, all my memories and things I sense when  I pray
     are  still  pictures,  that  is,  nothing  is  moving.   Occasionally,
     something like this happens as I  pray where movement occurs.  I  have
     no idea exactly why the memories are like fixed snap shot pictures but
     then  occasionally there is movement.  I  personally interpret it as a
     level of  deeper spiritual intimacy  occurring because in  every case,
     that's how it feels.
          Bret  asked me  if we could  return to  the two memories  to make
     certain we haven't  missed anything.  I  agreed and there  was nothing
     remaining in the  memory of the graveside service I  had concerning my
     father.  The hospital memory was different.
     Note.
          The moment I went back in my mind to the memory in  the hospital,
     I felt Jesus standing next  to me but did not see Him.  I also did not
     see my bed nor myself in the bed.  It felt like a large empty room.
          "I still feel a little bit of anger left in this memory," I said.
          "Holy Spirit," Bret prayed, "What do  you want Phil to know about
     this anger?"
          The feeling I received as an answer is a great deal  more complex
     than I am able to describe  but in my own words, it is  something like
     this.  The Lord told me that we are friends and that sometimes friends
     have disagreements and misunderstandings.  Sometimes friends will even
     have arguments  and  become angry.    Again, the  Lord said,  we  were
     friends so as  far as He  was concerned, the misunderstanding  and the
     anger  was over because  of our  friendship.  He  made it clear  in my
     thinking that He wasn't upset that I was mad at Him at  the time.  The
     feeling of being in a partnership  manifested in my thoughts again and
     seemed to be growing stronger.
          At this point, the remaining  feeling of anger vanished and there
     were no negative emotions remaining in that memory in the hospital.
          After reporting what  I felt the Lord was saying  about all this,
     Bret prayed again and said, "Holy Spirit, is  there anything else Phil
     needs to know about this memory?"
          Instantly I heard the words and  spoke them audibly the moment  I
     heard them because it was so strongly  stated, I could not keep quiet.
     I said, "I am not blind any more."
     Note.
          Of  course, this can  be taken two  ways, or both  ways, for that
     matter.  The Lord could  have been speaking spiritually or physically.
     It makes no  difference to me how you personally interpret what I just
     said.  I  know in my  heart, on  the other hand,  what He was  talking
     about.
          Again Bret prayed, "Holy Spirit, is there anything else?"
          I spoke it  the instant I heard  the words; "We are  leaving this
     place."
          "We are leaving this place?" Bret questioned.
     Note.
          The reason he asked this  question is due to the fact  I used the
     word "we."   In  demonic manifestation,  it is  common that  they will
     speak  in  the plural  because there  is often  more than  one demonic
     spirit involved.  Also, it is very common for demons to leave on their
     own when  the reason  for their presence  has been  removed, that  is,
     their implanted lies.  Sometimes  they will even say they  are leaving
     out loud  through the person's own voice or they  will say this in the
     mind of the  person receiving intercessory  prayer.  Additionally,  in
     the  case of multiple personalities, or Dissociative Identity Disorder
     cases, the term "we" is  sometimes used by the alternate personalities
     as a collective statement.   Since I figured this was  what Bret might
     be thinking, I clarified what I said.
          "Yes, the Lord said, we are leaving this place."
          A final time, Bret said, "Holy Spirit, is there anything else?"
          Again,  the words  came to  my mind  instantly and  I  spoke them
     aloud.  "And we are never coming back."
          Bret said, "I know that is true, Phil."
          "Oh, really?" I replied.  "How?"
          "Because," he said,  "that is exactly  what the  Lord said to  me
     before you spoke it out loud."
          I laughed because I have had the exact same thing happen to me as
     an intercessor when praying with others.
     Personal Comments
          Some  people think  this type  of thing  is still  psychology and
     packaged  in Biblical  terms.   They will  refer to  it as  regressive
     therapy, inner healing, hypnosis, suggestive imagery, and some like to
     call this Psycho  Heresy.  They never  once consider it to  be what it
     really is and that is agreement of two people in  intercessory prayer.
     When I am  praying with people, sometimes  I pray and sometimes  I ask
     them to pray.  What is going on in the  mind is nothing different than
     personal prayer that  is conducted silently.  If you  have never heard
     the Lord speaking to you in your thoughts, I would be concerned.  Why?
     Because if you do  not know His voice,  as He said we would  in John's
     Gospel, (see John 10:4), then you will find it less easy to follow Him
     as that verse  proclaims we should as His Sheep.  Additionally, if you
     do not know our Lord's voice, how will you know the difference in your
     thoughts when He speaks to you compared  to that of a demonic spirit's
     voice?  The  truth is, you  won't and you  will be deceived  if it  is
     demonic in nature.
     Illustration
          I was praying with a lady one day who was suicidal.  She admitted
     she was hearing  voices as well and  she concluded that she had  to be
     crazy.  Besides,  it was what everyone else thought; including her own
     doctor, friends, and family.   I asked her if  she wanted to pray  and
     she said that she did.   As we prayed, exactly as you have  read about
     in  this  testimony, she  began  to  experience  blockage to  her  own
     thoughts.   This can only  mean one  of three things.   The  person is
     mentally  ill  and  literally  is  incapable  of  focusing on  certain
     thoughts,  they  are  dissociative,  or  they  are  being  demonically
     influenced.  I asked this lady if she wanted to find out the truth and
     she said yes.  I prayed and in the name of the True Lord Jesus Christ,
     I set down parameters  for any demons that were present to  follow.  I
     told them, if  they did not obey  the rules, I would  immediately turn
     them over to the Lord Jesus Christ.  The reason for this is due to the
     nature of demonic  spirits.  They love to play with your mind and they
     love to sidetrack  you from finding out  the truth, that is,  why they
     have the right  to be there in that person's life  in the first place.
     If you  spend any  other time  trying to  debate them,  you will  most
     likely be  fooled.  Laying down  guidelines or parameters  for them to
     obey sets the  rules.   If they disobey,  they immediately are  turned
     over to Jesus because  He is their Lord and Master  and they must obey
     Him and His Word.
          Once this  was done, I asked the Lord  Jesus to pick a spokesman,
     if there was  more than one  unclean spirit present,  to speak and  to
     confess why they have the right to be in this woman's life.  This is a
     good idea unless you want to be talking with different demons  all day
     long.  Besides, we don't need to talk to all of them  anyway.  A demon
     spoke in this woman's mind and she told me what he said.
          To  make a long story short, the  Lord did something very unusual
     for this lady.  When I asked her what she was hearing in her thoughts,
     she said, "Well, I hear two voices."  I asked her what one was saying.
     She said, "It  is saying I am  crazy and should be in  the hospital to
     get help."  I asked her  if she knew who that voice was  and she said,
     "That's a demon."  I asked her what the other voice was saying in  her
     thoughts  and she said, "He is saying, I  am not crazy and He can heal
     and He cares for me."   I asked her if she  knew who that was and  she
     said, "that has to be the Lord."
          I said, "Can you see what the Lord just has done for you?"
          She said, "What?"
          I said, "The Lord just proved to you  that you are not crazy."  I
     said, "If you  were crazy, you could  not have told me  the difference
     between those two voices but  because you do recognize the difference,
     the Lord showed you that you are not crazy."
          This is why it is important that we hear the Lord as we pray  and
     know His voice.  Otherwise, we can be easily fooled in to listening to
     the wrong voice.


                                   Conclusion


          Following the  closing of the  church I pastored for  only eleven
     months, I began  having anxiety and panic  attacks.  Due to  the manic
     depression, I found  it impossible to  work.   During this three  year
     period of my life, a good friend  called one night.  "Hey, Phil.  This
     is Bill.   I want you  to go with  me to hear  an evangelist speak  at
     First Assemblies of God in Aurora where I am a member."
          "When is he going to be there?" I asked; thinking I could put him
     off week by week until he gave up on me.
          "He is preaching tonight and he is  great.  I want to pick you up
     tonight."
          I tried getting  out of it but  Bill was so insistent,  I finally
     gave in.   I had told him no about such things so many times before, I
     finally decided I couldn't say no any more.
          I cannot  remember this preacher's  last name but his  first name
     was Jim.   He was good and  I actually found myself  encouraged by his
     preaching  that  night.    He  wasn't  the  typical  pulpit  pounding,
     overbearing yelling type of  preacher like I am, but he was good and I
     appreciated what he said.
          Of course,  there was an  altar call  and about everybody  in the
     meeting, including my friend, when forward for prayer.  I didn't.
          Bill returned after  being prayed for and asked me if I wanted to
     go  down for prayer.  I said I  didn't need to but thanked him anyway.
     We waited,  for what,  I didn't  know.   I felt  anxiety building  and
     tightness growing  in my chest and I wanted to  get home.  Yet, we sat
     there doing nothing as others received prayer.
          Probably thirty minutes passed and  my friend said, "Are you sure
     you don't want him to pray with you?  Just about everybody is gone."
          "Naw," I said; I'm fine.  Talk about lying.
          "Oh, come on, Phil.  What can it hurt."
          Bill knew the depression  I had been going through.  "All right,"
     I sighed, "let's go."
          The building  was almost empty and few people  were left as I was
     introduced to the evangelist.  He took my hand and said, "I bet I know
     what you want."
          "I said, "No, I really do not need to pray about being healed and
     getting  my sight  back  because I  have settled  that issue  with God
     already."
          "Then what shall we pray about?" he asked kindly.
          "I  said I  was just having  a hard  time right now  and was very
     discouraged."   What an understatement  but this man  was wiser than I
     gave him credit.
          He said, "I  want to tell you  something.  The  Lord is going  to
     call you into a deliverance ministry."
          I immediately broke down and began to cry.  Barely able to speak,
     I  said,  "I  don't want  to  be  in a  deliverance  ministry,"  and I
     explained how I had been demonically attacked already.
          "No,  no," he  said.   "I'm sorry.    I don't  mean that  type of
     ministry of casting  out demons and all  that stuff we think  about as
     Charismatics and Pentecostals.  You are going to work with people one-
     on-one and this will be something totally different.  You are going to
     be greatly used by Godin the new ministry and ministerto many people."
          We prayed and  I thought nothing more  about it.   I had no  idea
     what he  had been talking about until nearly fourteen years later when
     his personal prophecy concerning my life came to pass.  I am now doing
     exactly what he said the Lord revealed to him about me.  If I knew the
     man's  name and how to find him, I  would love to talk to him and tell
     him  he really did hear from the Lord  that night he prayed for me and
     the personal prophecy the Lord gave him for me has come to pass.
     Final Remarks
          Now, where are you in God?  Do you feel his love?  When you pray,
     are you aware of His presence in your life?  What about those thoughts
     in your mind?  Why aren't they in agreement with God's Word?  Could it
     be that you,  too, are believing a  lie?  Let  me suggest that you  go
     back and read  this testimony again and you will see yourself, in some
     way, in my story.  Then pick up your telephone and call me.