Blinded By A Doublebind
By Phil Scovell
She had been just a little girl when her father began molesting
her. Later, as a teenager, she would learn from her mother that early
in their marriage, sexual intercourse had ceased to exist because she,
the mother, no longer wanted that type of intimacy from her husband.
The little girl, therefore, became his unholy sexual outlet. No,
there are no excuses here. Sin is sin and evil is evil and crime is
crime and this is all of that. Today, such a molester would go to
prison and the mother would go free in spite of her sin but both will
be judged as accountable before the Judgement Seat of Christ some day
regardless of societal lack.
We were praying. The vivid memory of a teenager came to mind and
she began to cry. We prayed some more. "I'm ashamed," she admitted
through her tears.
"I understand," I said quietly. "It's ok."
She confessed the memory was of her mid teens. She entered her
father's bedroom as he stood in front of a dresser and prepared to go
out. A mirror on the back of the dresser reflected their image. "I'm
so ashamed of what I did, Phil. I don't think I can tell you." She
was crying nearly uncontrollably now.
"You don't have to go there if you can't. Just listen." I
prayed more and asked for the Lord to show her the way.
"Oh, I am so ashamed," she repeated. "I was trying to show off.
I was trying to get my dad to notice me."
"Notice you how?" I encouraged; knowing the answer already but
also knowing this was where the Lord had led her.
"I wanted him to notice me sexually," and now her words, through
her crying, were almost unintelligible. "It was all so wrong," she
I said softly, "You knew it was wrong when you were little, too?"
"Yes," she wept and whimpered almost as a little girl.
"He even tried again years later when you were 13 but you ran
from him. Right?" I asked.
"Yes, I did run away from him. It was wrong and I knew it. Then
why did I try and show off this time to him? I knew better."
"That's a good question," I said. "Lord Jesus, what is the
answer to her question? Why did she try and show off sexually to get
her father to notice her in her mid teens?"
As she cried quietly, she finally said, as the spiritual
awareness bloomed in her spirit, "I was deceived."
"yes," I responded, "you were. Furthermore, you were trapped in
She asked what that might be.
"It is when the Enemy deceives us into believing a lie with no
way out, that is, we are trapped at either end."
"Then," she said, "how was I trapped in this situation as an
older teenager and my dad? I knew by this time it was wrong and even
"Of course you did. When you were 4 and 5 years old," I
explained, your little mind wasn't mature enough to fully understand
all that was happening to you. Besides, it was your dad. Your dad
loved you so how could what he was doing be wrong? That's what you
thought anyway. Yes, even this concept alone conceived confusion in
the little girl's mind. Then, when the little girl grew older, her
power of reasoning matured and she knew it was wrong and she ran
"But I still don't understand," she interrupted, "why I tried to
get him to notice me sexually as an older teenager? It was hideously
"What was the one word answer the Lord told you when I asked Him
to reveal the truth of that question to you?"
"He said I was deceived."
"Right," I agreed. "The Enemy deceived you into thinking,
because of what happened repeatedly as a little girl who didn't
understand, it was now ok as a big girl because, after all, your
father loved you, and you loved your father. It was a lie of the
Enemy as a little girl and it was still a lie as a big girl."
"I see it now," she almost whispered. The devil lied to me from
The man said, "But why did I do it?"
He was referring to a teenage incident where he molested his
younger sister. There had been no penetration, no skin-to-skin
contact, and no removal of clothing but regardless, it was sin and he
knew it. The man had lived his entire life with the guilt and trapped
by it's heaviness for decades.
"I was a Christian at the time, too. I knew better. I knew it
was wrong. I knew it was sin but I still did it. Why?" he pleaded.
Although the man was free of the sin, unless he found the way of
escape God had prepared for him, the guilt would return and he knew
"Lord, why did he do it?" we prayed together.
The man suddenly sat very still as if something had just entered
the quietness of the room and he were listening. Then he sat up. "I
heard it. I know the answer," he announced confidently. "This is
"What was that," he was asked.
"I did it because I was deceived."
"You are right," the intercessor answered.
"I'm free! I'm totally free," the man proclaimed with finality.
"It's gone for ever," and so it was. The man now saw God's truth and
knew it wasn't what he really wanted to do; it was what he had been
deceived into doing. That is, he was deceived into committing sin
which only a loving God could forgive who had vicariously died in his
A woman was enjoying the afternoon. The weather was beautiful
and she had enjoyed her walk.
"It's a beautiful tree, isn't it?" came the smooth pleasant silky
voice from the exquisitely beautiful shining creature.
She stopped and looked. "Yes, as a matter of fact, it is quite
beautiful. Everything God makes is beautiful," she commented as she
had so many hundreds of times over the years.
"Have you noticed the fruit?" the voice asked. "It, too, is
quite beautiful. It must be delicious."
The woman said nothing but watched.
"Why not try some of the fruit? After all, you deserve it."
"Oh, no," she replied. "We are forbidden. In fact, if we eat
the fruit of this tree, we will die. We aren't even suppose to touch
"Oh, come on," the voice chuckled. "Die? that's a laugh. You
are eternal. You can't die. Besides, if you eat this fruit, you'll
be like me; like a god. You'll know everything; good and evil. I
know good from evil and I am eternal as are you."
The woman stepped closer. The fruit was lovely in appearance.
It certainly would be good tasting as beautiful as it looked.
Somehow, it even appeared that to eat of such fruit would increase her
wisdom, too, so she gingerly pulled the fruit from a branch and bit
into its richness.
I'm certain this story is familiar, if you've read the Bible,
because this was what happened to Eve and eventually to her husband,
Adam. Do you see the doublebind Satan used on Eve just as He has on
others? If she didn't eat the fruit, she wouldn't be as a god. If
she did, on the other hand, she would be as God; wise and eternal and
all knowing. Who wouldn't want that? Eve was trapped by the words of
the Evil One for such was his plan. She was deceived by the master
Are you trapped as well? Has he also used a doublebind on you as
he has on so many others throughout time? There is a way of escape.
It is the Word of God expressed in His voice. If you cannot clearly
hear His voice, you, too, will be locked in deceitfulness for ever and
carry the guilt of your own sin. Jesus died to make His voice clear
and to lift the guilt away. Yes, that means even you.
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